Confusion
by Random Yaoi Fangirl
Summary: A lot of confusion as it says ;;; And Yaoiiiii of course (I'm soooo addicted!) XxZero... My first try on them
1. Sudden Realization

Hello again! So, second try to upload something... But now I've got a beta- reader so I hope removing won't happen again I didn't know my English was THAT bad that they just remove it... (Actually I read worse fics than this that hadn't been deleted....) So again to the plot: It's X and Zero, and it's yaoi, and my first try and anything (except for a Houshin Engi Fanfic...) Normally I write humour or parody stuff, guess I'm better at that than romance... anyway, Since I wasn't able to upload anything until now, I already wrote 3 more chapters... but they have to be beta-read first. Please review! It's X's POV.

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It's just another boring day at HQ. Nothing special happening or so I thought. I just decided to look for Zero to ask him go to the city or something when I hear a voice, a female voice. Iris. I shiver. I don't know why though. She didn't do anything to me but it seems that I'm not too pleased with her around. She's even a nice and polite girl. I don't tease her or anything like that like Zero always does, but I try to avoid her. I think Zero could be nicer to her, but all the same he was dating her. I just don't get it! She's been at HQ for half a year now, and she takes every single chance to get around him. Could that be what's bothering me? Because of her, I had less time with my best friend. Or maybe I'm just... jealous? I shake my head although nobody sees me anyway. He's just my best friend. And IF I'm jealous that's just fine. That's normal for friends. It's not like I'm in love or something right? I'm laughing loudly as if to prove the fact to myself. I suddenly stop. That was Zeros voice! I'm very quiet now. I don't want to spy, but I just can't help it...  
  
"How about tonight? I know you're free Zero!" That was Iris... "No Iris, you're wrong! I'm so busy tonight you can't even imagine! You know... Paperwork and... stuff..."  
  
It's so obvious he's got nothing to do tonight... Jeez, I'm actually feeling sorry for her. I know she likes Zero very much. But nevertheless, somehow Zero's answer calms me down. I think I can walk over to them now.  
  
"Hey X!" Zeros face lights up as he sees me. I smile. "Hey Zero." "Hello X..." Iris doesn't sound very happy. "What's wrong?" That was just me! Why did I just say that?? I know pretty well what's up and I force her to tell it. On top, I don't really want to hear it... "Oh it's... nothing. Just Zero seems busy tonight..." "OH about THAT... hum... Screw that paperwork, let's go out!"  
  
What?? Did Zero just say that?! My eyes widen. "But I thought – "I cut off myself. I couldn't say this or they knew I overheard them. Iris suddenly smiles, very wide.  
  
"Oh Zero, really?? That's soooo wonderful!!! I'll be ready at seven!" She smiles even more, and then kisses him on the cheek. I suddenly feel the urge to shove her off of him... But she's already gone... I must have been in some kind of trance for a few seconds, because when I finally hear Zero call me he must have called already a couple of times.  
  
"X?? Hello?? Can you hear me? What's wrong?" He's still smiling. "Hum. Er.. So you're going out with her tonight?" "Yes. Do you have a problem with that? Hey if you have something urgent to do tonight, just tell me and I cancel the date!"  
  
There's something in his look I don't really know how to interpret. Could it be he wanted me to just say so? To provoke me? Hm. No, why should he? I rather think he's just making fun. His smile suddenly vanishes.  
  
"Hey X, something wrong?" He kind of wakes me up with that. "AH Yes! I—I mean no! Everything's just fine! Haha...." I think I'm blushing. Better get going fast. "Sorry Zero... Lots of paperwork waiting for me. Alia will kill me if it's not done tomorrow... See ya..." and with this I'm rushing away, not daring to take another look at Zero.  
  
Now I'm all alone again, in my room. It's 7:30. Zero must be out somewhere with Iris now. Hope they're having fun...or not? What's just going on with me? He's my best friend of course. But is it that bad he's spending time with her? Better take a walk. If I just stay here I'll eventually go crazy!  
  
As I stride through the hallways and outside, I head straight for a little forest. I like this place. I often come here to think. I have some places no one knows except for Zero. I go there when I need to think, mostly after battles. As I walk on, I suddenly hear some rookies talk. Females, giggling and babbling. I really dislike that for some reason. Giggling girls. I don't know why...  
  
"Yes, I'm telling you!! They kissed!!!" Ah, just great, they're talking about another girl they know and her date or something. Better get away... "Really??? I know Zero's known to get into bed with many girls, aw, he's just so adorable isn't he? But kissing?? I mean – wow! That's not just an affair then!"  
  
I stop at once and nearly fall over by the sudden movement. Did they just talk about Zero? I just have to know... So I hide behind a tree and listen. Second time for spying on people today... Isn't one of my best days I guess... I hear another girl talk.  
  
"If I'm telling you!! Iris herself told me! As we already know they're dating for a couple of months now and of course did it lots of times... and as well, kissed!" "Never!" the first girl replies. "Really! Last week! She couldn't believe it herself, she was just sooo happy! Oh it must be sooo great to have Zero as a boyfriend!" The girls all sighed.  
  
That's too much! I run off. Off to one of those places nobody knows – except Zero. But he won't come anyway. Not today. Maybe never... Those girls were right. Zero was well known for his affairs and getting everyone laid who was willing to, and almost everybody was. No wonder, he sure is attractive... Handsome... Hey, what am I thinking??  
  
For about 10 minutes I'm just standing there at the cliff. Then it just occurs to me. Who am I kidding? It's pretty obvious. It has been a long time now and I just didn't want to admit it to myself all along. I'm going crazy right now knowing Zero is with her at this very moment instead of being with me. And it's tearing my heart apart when I think of what I just heard.  
  
They have kissed. It's right. Kissing is something else than, well, what Zero usually does. I don't like to think of that as well, but that's nothing that involves feelings. At least not necessarily. But kissing... You wouldn't kiss anyone you don't really love, would you Zero? I wouldn't... It's just so obvious. I fell in love with my best friend and I'm dying of the thought he's in love with... Iris... and they're together right now.  
  
Suddenly I feel tears running down my cheeks. Great, now I'm even crying! I sit down at the edge and watch the sunset, silent tears still running. I don't care.  
  
...  
  
It's already dark now. What time might it be? I don't bother to check on it, I just don't care. The darkness is somehow soothing, like a blanket, that's giving me protection. And still... I'm feeling lonely... How many hours might have passed since I sat down here?  
  
"Thinking again?" I turn around, frightened. Zero! Of course, nobody except him knows I'm going here...  
  
"Zero...? How long have you – " "Long enough X." He sits down next to me. "Did something hap – did you cry?!" As he talks to me I look into his eyes, and mine still must be teary. Damn! Hastily I wipe them and try to laugh the fact away.  
  
"Haha, me? Crying? Why should I? Guess I just got something in my eye!" "In both?" "Hum, yes!" Silence. "Ooookay then... I just pretend I believe you for now okay?" I know he doesn't but I'm thankful he's not going on that.  
  
"X, why did you come here. What's wrong?" "Nothing." "Man X, I know you! You don't come here unless something's wrong!" "No, really, it's okay. I was just... Hum... Bored." "Really? What about all that paperwork?" "I lied." "YOU lied?? Now I'm sure something's wrong! You never lie!" "Oh Zero, really! Just let go okay? I DID have some paperwork to do! Really!"  
  
At least, this wasn't a lie. I HAD paperwork to do but didn't do it anyway. I wouldn't lie, he's right...  
  
"I thought you lied when you said that?" Zero looks pretty confused. So I continue to talk myself out of it somehow. "I just didn't want to hold you back from your date so I stated that paperwork stuff to leave you alone okay? Anyway, how was it?" Hey, I'm sounding really unconcerned! I'm proud of myself! Or better, I'm delighted my voice just didn't break in...  
  
Zero shrugs. "Ohhhh so that's it! This leaving us alone stuff, talking nonsense... You're jealous right?" I cough. "What??" How could he figure that out so fast?? "Of course not!! Okay I admit I get a little few time with my best friend the last couple of months, but despite that – "  
  
"You're jealous!" He's chuckling!! I can't believe this. Furious I get up. "If you can't be serious we don't need to talk about anything. If you don't want to tell me how your date with Iris went, my pleasure! I'm going to bed now! Good night Zero!" And with this I walk away, very quickly.  
  
Damn, I think I even blushed when he mentioned that jealousy thing. But I'm sure he didn't notice; it's dark after all. However, I'm happy he didn't answer. I don't really want to know how their date was... I wonder if he's following me... I stop and turn around. No Zero anywhere. I sigh. "Ha, nobody cares for me anyway. Where I am, what I do. Nobody would notice if I just jump off that cliff..." Why am I saying that aloud? Nobody's here...  
  
"What the hell are you talking about?" "GAHHHH!!!" I fall over, shocked. Zero must have appeared right behind me when I turned to see if he followed me. Now I'm sitting on the ground, my back hurting. "ZERO!!! Do you have to frighten me like that??"  
  
"Sorry pal, I didn't know you were so jumpy." He offers me a hand and pulls me up. "I just thought it wasn't good for you to walk back to HQ alone at night. I could have been a maverick you know?" He's grinning. I will never really know him I guess... I sigh again.  
  
"I'm fine okay? It's not like I never fought mavericks or suddenly was confronted with an unexpected situation." "Yeah, but as far as I remember I was always around to take care of you right?" "That's not true! Of course I had to deal some situations like that by myself!" "Like which? Name one." "AH, Zero, you're annoying! See, there's.... That one day at... No, you were there as well... But at... No... "  
  
That's not true is it? Zero really has been around in such situations. In every single one! I can't believe it.  
  
"Got me..." Zero smiles victorious. "So, and that's why I'm escorting you back to HQ straight into your room to make sure my best friends gets to sleep alright! C'mon!" I shiver as he puts his arm around me to guide me back. "Freezing?" "What? Err.... N- no, just... oh forget it..." I lower my head. This can't just be my life, can it?  
  
...  
  
"Okay... Hum... Thanks... I guess..." We're at my room. I wonder why the way had to be that short when he removes his arm from my shoulders. "Good night, X!" He turns to leave. "And remember; don't walk around at night when I'm not around, k?" I look at him. "Promise!" He suddenly has a strangely serious look on his face. I don't even dare to contradict. "I promise. Good night Zero." He smiles and walks away.  
  
As I fall down on my bed I try to think of what had happened this day. It was all so confusing. I don't want to think about it any more and try to sleep. But I can't...


	2. Funny Secrets

First of all, thanks to the reviewers! Although not many, I'm glad at least two people seem to think this FF's good ;;;Thank you so much, if no one would have reviewed at all I really would have thought about cancelling this fic... Okay, next chapter! I'm at work... I don't know but I think 90% of my Fanfictions were written at work... (Some people could think I don't have enough to do here. Hm. They're right I guess ;;;) Whatever, here comes chapter two! Again X's POV (I think the whole story will be...)  
  
Did I mention I was inspired by some of the X/Zero FFs here on FF.net? And before I forget, the characters are not mine. Unfortunately...  
  
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I must look like I haven't slept for years although it was just one night. I actually didn't even close an eye. I look at the clock, only 5 in the morning. I decide to walk around HQ a bit. Better than staying here and think about what happened yesterday some more hours.  
  
I head to the cafeteria. If I'm already up I can have a look there just as well and get something to eat. On my way, I almost walk into a person.  
  
"Hey, watch it! Oh, X, it's you. Why are you up so early?" "Morning Alia... I'm sorry, guess I just didn't see you." "No wonder. You're eyes are almost closed! Did you sleep at all?" "Not really. But I'm not tired anyway. I wanted to get me something to eat." She frowns. "X, everything alright? I've never seen you like this!"  
  
I just don't get it! How is everyone realizing at once that I've got something bothering me? Am I that easy to be seen through? Can't she reckon I'm just... hum... overworked or something?  
  
"X? X!" "What?!" Yeah, caught daydreaming again. That really betters my case I guess... "Really X, what's up with you? You should go having Lifesaver check you!" "No Alia, it's nothing! Just lack of sleep I told you. I'll get something to eat now and then try to sleep once again okay?" "If you think... But be careful okay? Don't rush things..."  
  
With that, she's off. Don't rush things? What the heck was that supposed to mean? Better ignore it, I've got enough things on my mind right now...  
  
...  
  
Same place, other time. I've been here this morning and met Alia. I told her I would try to sleep once more, but I didn't. I just knew I couldn't so I didn't bother to try at all. I wonder where Zero is... I haven't seen him all day... And just when I think this, I hear the familiar voice.  
  
I smile at once without really noticing it and take a short run around the corner to see Zero and – Iris... Of all people, of course, he had to be with her again. Just great I decided to run there, now I couldn't try to sneak off unheard because they already caught sight of me.  
  
"X! Hey I already wondered where you've been all day!" Zero smiles. "You didn't take another walk out alone did you?"  
  
He looks like a big brother who's assuming me to ignore his orders. "Of course not... Hi Iris..."  
  
Nice answer. I defended myself like a little boy plus greeted my worst enemy. This just occurred to me yesterday.  
  
"Hi X! Had a nice sleep?" She smiles as she always does. But since the change of situation it was now, I couldn't help but think that this smile looks really false... I suddenly feel the urge of torturing her... violently.. VERY violently... what am I thinking?! This isn't like me. But the more I think about it the more tempting it sounds. I smile to myseld inside.  
  
"What kind of question was that Iris?!" I look up. Zero looks at her as if he wants to slap her right in the face or something.  
  
"What do you mean?" "You can see very clearly he hasn't slept well! If he had slept anyway."  
  
Iris took another look at me. I feel very uncomfortable being the topic of this conversation.  
  
"Am I right X?" "What? Ah, yes! I mean, I tried... But I couldn't sleep. Whatever..."  
  
Damn! Would I ever be able to talk to Zero again in a normal way? This is really annoying!  
  
For a few seconds nobody says anything. And for all persons who could have put an end to this, it is Iris...  
  
"So, Zero, what about tonight?"  
  
Tonight?? Don't tell me they are dating again! Once a week... No wait, once a month or so should be more than enough!! ... Jeez I'm glad I got myself so far under control I didn't say that to her... even if I wanted to. More than that, I would have liked to just link arms with Zero going away with him leaving Iris behind to see her stupid face! Unfortunately I don't dare to do so...  
  
"Today? Again?" Zero asked. I look confused. Was he reading my mind?!  
  
"Yes! What's wrong with that?"  
  
"Hm, let's see. Let's ask X!"  
  
Me?? But why –  
  
"So X, what do you think? Should I date Iris tonight or rather not?"  
  
The two of them look at me waiting for my statement. Iris seems not to sure if she should be angry about that or hopeful. At last she decided to give me a begging look. Just great, hit me at my weak spot, my conscience... I wonder why it still works when she is looking at me like that. That shouldn't affect me in any way after the thoughts of giving her as much pain as possible recently.  
  
"W- why do you ask me anyway? It's your decision!" "Come on X! Think!"  
  
I wonder if there's a camera hidden somewhere. What's his point? Oh and for heaven's sake, could Iris just stop looking so pitiful??  
  
"Well... I think..." If I wouldn't care what would happen after my answer I would have just said no of course. I simply don't want them to be together. But I did care, unfortunately...  
  
"Well??" Zero grins. He must know what I'm about to answer. So I better get over with it.  
  
"Okay, I think you should go."  
  
Proud of myself letting this out sounding almost as if I didn't care I was pretty sure to have exactly said what Zero wanted to hear. Just to see his jaw drop and Iris jumping happily around. Now I am really confused.  
  
"Yay!! Thanks X! Zero's so weird sometimes! He said he wouldn't go anywhere without asking you!"  
  
Not enough with that, she hugs me. What have I done? Zero doesn't look to pleased either. His look changes from surprise to anger. Luckily Iris doesn't see that. Although somehow I wish she could...  
  
Suddenly Zero pulls Iris away from me. If he knows what kind of favour this is?  
  
"Hey X, don't be foolish!" Now he's laughing. I wonder if this is a Zero from another dimension who kidnapped my Zero who was held prison now somewhere...  
  
"But wha-" "You know pretty well what I mean!" He glares at me. With my newest consideration of the Zero impostor I feel slightly uncomfortable by this. Iris just looks puzzled now.  
  
"You know what I mean! Man, X, you're such a nice guy, but you don't have to do that for me!"  
  
I really have no idea what he's talking about. But I guess it's better not to respond now. Not yet.  
  
"What are you two talking about??"  
  
The two of us? If Iris knew I am as clueless as her she would be even more confused than me.  
  
"I'm talking about our date!"  
  
Silence. Zero looks at me and grins. Now it's Iris turn to jaw-drop. I feel the confusion has reached its maximum. I just hope that Zero would explain this, because if I ask what he's talking about the maximum of confusion would be... oh this is getting really ridiculous!  
  
"It's really really nice of you that you want to do me a favour, but I didn't ask for that. You don't have to cancel our date, if I may call it so, just to let me go out with Iris!"  
  
"Ehm...." Thankfully Zero just goes on talking before I have to make up something to say.  
  
"You know Iris, X and I wanted to go out tonight, having fun in the city and stuff!"  
  
Zero puts his arm around me... I slightly blush and look down before anyone sees it. "Oh... Is that so... X?"  
  
Damn! Iris wants my statement! I look up to Zero for help. As he pointed out just the day before, I can't lie. Well, I guess I could manage as it would be exactly what I wanted in this case – Zero not going out with her - but I have troubles getting myself to do so.  
  
"What's wrong with you Iris? Don't you believe me? Come on X, we've got stuff to get ready for tonight! See ya Iris!"  
  
And with this he just turns around pulling me with him, leaving Iris very confused, and I'm sure, upset.  
  
When I'm sure she couldn't hear us any more, I stop. No matter how much I dislike Iris or I'm happy about that secretly, that was just not fair.  
  
"What's up X?" "Zero, what's with all this?" "What do you mean?" "You know just too well what I'm talking about! This wasn't very nice of you! Getting rid of Iris just like that! I think you like her?" Zero doesn't smile any more. "So what? Don't you think it's my decision who I want to go out with?!" "Of course it is! And that's exactly why I'm asking myself why you wanted me to decide this for you!"  
  
Checkmate! I got Zero cornered. Let's see how he'll try to get out of this.  
  
"Is it such a bad thing to take your best friend's advice? Anyway, if you like her so much, why don't you go out with her tonight?!"  
  
His arm was no longer around me. Meanwhile he looks furious. What did I do to him? It seems that whatever I do is wrong. I don't want him to be angry at me. Especially not because of Iris! I'd like to tell him how relieved I felt when he said he wouldn't go out with her tonight.  
  
"Why did you say I should go out with her tonight?"  
  
This question completely took me by surprise. Why does he want to know that?  
  
"Well... I... I just didn't know what to say..." "Yesterday you told me you'd get too few time with me, and here I offer you the chance to change that and what do you do?" "Jeez I'm sorry! I just thought you wanted to go out with her." "Why would I have asked you if I really wanted to date her?" "Why do you ask me such weird questions? See, she looked so upset when you asked me if you should date. I couldn't bring myself to say you shouldn't go out." "Couldn't bring yourself? So you actually didn't want me to go out with her?"  
  
Alert!! Trap!! Gotta watch out! GAHHH!!!  
  
"No no no!!! What I wanted to say was... That... I just thought it wasn't fair to dump her just like that... And... She's your girlfriend at all..."  
  
I don't get the chance to say anything else. Zeros face changed the last time in this conversation, this time to really disappointed. I wonder why. I didn't say anything that could have disappointed him, did I? Without saying another word he walks away, leaving me still confused. Why do I even care?? Angry at Zero and myself, I walk off in the other direction.  
  
...  
  
I'm lying on my bed, just watching the ceiling. Several hours had passed since Zero left me standing in the hallway. I still wonder what I've said that had gotten him so angry.  
  
A hesitant knocking on my door pulled me back to reality. I really do daydream a lot the last days...  
  
"Come in."  
  
The moment I say this I wonder why I didn't ask who it was first. Somehow I just hoped it would be Zero. When the door opens, I smile. It was him!  
  
"Hi X... can we talk?" "Sure. Come in."  
  
I get to sit on my bed allowing Zero to sit down next to me.  
  
"See, I'm sorry! For what happened before." "Me too."  
  
He looks confused.  
  
"What should you be sorry for?" "You know, what I said! What made you angry at me and go away." "And that would be?" "Well..."  
  
Truth is, I still don't know.  
  
"There! That's what I mean. You don't even know what you did. And I know you didn't say anything to hurt me or something, and if, you didn't mean to. So you don't have to apologize for anything. I have to, because I got you into that weird situation with Iris by asking you what you think of our date. And worse, leaving you back like that when you didn't even know what you've done."  
  
Nice. Thanks a lot Zero. I really wonder if I should go on setting new higher limits for confusion all the time. I think I just wait for it to increase. As much as I learned today, confusion is unlimited.  
  
"Am I confusing you?" "What? Oh, just a bit..."  
  
Jerk. He knows pretty well he's confusing me with this nonsense he's talking! Why doesn't he just come out with it and tells me what I said that made him so angry?  
  
"So, what about our little date tonight?" "WHAT?" "X, don't you always act like I'm going to rape you or something! You know what I mean! How about going to the city and have some fun?" "Oh, okay..."  
  
Of course, deep inside, my heart jumps.  
  
"And guess what! I might tell you what got me angry earlier!"  
  
He grins stupidly. What's that about? Is it such a secret? I don't care anymore, if there's any chance to get at least a bit less confused I'd take it.  
  
"Okay, let's go then."  
  
I get up, waiting for Zero to come. He's still grinning. Must be really funny to have a secret... 


	3. Confusion contest round 1

Chapter Three, wheee! Of course at work. Thanks for the reviews so far!! hugs everybody Glad at least some people like the stuff I'm writing! I'm sorry I need so long, but I was on vacation and didn't have the time to do anything here. Just hope you'll like this chapter as the others! Okay, now on before I forget what I'm about to write g X's POV. Please review and let me know what you think of it!

We didn't bother to change clothes when we left my room and head for the city. Whatever I might feel, I just decided to enjoy this evening and try to see Zero as a friend, not more. I don't really know anyway if I would rather like him to return my feelings or mine to vanish to be friends again as always.

Our friendship means so much to me. I'm afraid to lose it. But the more time passes, I can't help but think that my feelings won't just go away like they came if I wouldn't tell Zero what I feel and get the answer right into my face. There's no other way to start getting over those feelings... If he doesn't tell me he's not feeling that way I would always have a tiny hope somewhere in my mind that wouldn't let me forget about my emotions.

Wah, I'm thinking too much again! We're already on our way. Just hope Zero didn't talk to me meanwhile, if he had, I didn't hear anything... I sweatdrop.

"Off in your own world again X?"

It must be an imposter! There's no way Zero could read my mind the last days all the sudden!

"Guess so."

"You daydream a lot the last days. Must be a great dream if you can't let it go."

He smiles. I wouldn't call it a dream. And of course not great! It's... eating me up.

"X, just try to forget about anything that bothers you! We'll have lots of fun tonight, Karaoke, bars, drinking, anything!"

"You know I don't drink much..."

"Time to change!"

And with this he pulls me directly into a bar.

Inside I try to remember if we've already been here before. I don't get the time to finish the thought because Zero already orders drinks for us.

"Cheers!" He empties his glass easily.

"Cheers..." I'm not that fast. But this really tastes good... What might it be?

"Hey X, I'm proud of you! You never drank so fast before!

"What are you talking about?"

When I take another look at my – now empty – glass I knew what he meant. Without noticing it was already empty.

"Oh. Well, it just tastes good. Can I have another one?"

"Be my guest!"

He orders two more for us. And so it goes on...

...

Not much later I already feel really drunk. I don't care, that's the best way to forget about things. Though it's a little weird, because normally Zero's the drunken one and I have to take care of him. This time he was giving me support when walking.

"Uhhh Zero I think that was a little much for me... Why didn't you stop me?"

"You wouldn't let me silly! Remember?" He laughs.

"Ohhhh Zero you're mean! You don't like me any more! I know it!!"

I look really sad, about ready to cry. At least this must be what Zero thinks of my expression because he suddenly looks guilty.

"No! Of course I like you, how could I not! And you know that! Who if not you would I have canceled a date for?"

ARG! He did just mention the thing I'm trying to forget all night! My mood decreases instantly.

"I didn't ask you for it..."

"What's up X? I didn't mean to give you the responsibility for this! I just.. wanted to point out that you are more important to me than a date!"

What was that? I must look exactly as if I just have said that due to Zero's reaction.

"I- I mean you're my best friend right? And no girl should be getting between us don't you think? Haha!"

He looks really stupid when he tries to distract me from something. I decide that it's better not to argue now. And my brain's so blurry right now I'm not really able to think about what it could possibly be he wants to distract me from.

"Okay. If you say so."

Suddenly I feel my legs not willing to support me any more. Luckily I'm already supported by Zero or else I would have fallen flat on the floor.

"Hey watch it X! Wow, now I know how you feel all the time when I'm drunk!"

"That's nothing! When you're drunk you're still able to walk properly for some reason, at least you're not falling... I think I couldn't carry you as easily as you do right now... wait..?!"

Did it really take me so much time to realize he was carrying me? I didn't even notice that the floor under my feet completely vanished. And if, I would have guessed that's due to the alcohol... I blush.

"No need to be ashamed X! It's okay! Actually I think it's really funny to see you drunk for the first time!"

"This isn't funny...." I mumble.

"Take the good part of it! I might be able to walk when drunk which you don't, but on the other hand you're still able to think clearly what I do not when having too much alcohol!"

He grins. I don't really know what to say. In my opinion I wasn't able to think clearly for already a couple of days, even when sober.

"I guess we're the perfect team. Imagine we're both really drunk! I could walk us home with you telling where to go! Hahaha!"

Now he bursts into loud laughters. For a moment I consider thinking about what he said, but then just laughed as well. Better no more thinking today, it's just confusing me. And the imagination of Zero carrying me just as he does right know, with me giving directions like a navigation system... "Please turn right at the next corner." ... that's really amusing! So we both don't stop laughing for the next minutes.

...

About two hours later we're back at HQ. It's already very late so I didn't expect anyone to be still up. As always when I think so, someone teaches me better...

"Hey guys!!"

Zero and me turn around.

"Oh. Iris. You're still awake..."

My face darkens although I don't really mean to. Stupid alcohol. How am I supposed to hide my feelings like this?

At least Zero doesn't look too happy as well.

"You should sleep already. It's late."

"You are still up as well!"

"That's a completely different thing!"

Seems like Zero wants to start a fight with her. My pleasure. Where's the popcorn?

"You're not my father to tell me what to do!"

Oh yeah I should drink more often! Sober I would have never been able to enjoy this nearly as much as I do now! I don't even feel guilty for thinking so! I would... tomorrow. I know that. But who cares right now? Hey what about that popcorn?

"Iris I don't want to discuss this now. Just go to bed, so will we now, right X?"

I blush.

"DAMN X, not together! You in yours and me in mine!"

"Oh..."

At least I could blame the alcohol for this reaction. Man I really think alcohol's not that bad after all!

"You're... you're mean Zero!"

Iris sobs and rushes away. Now I feel a tinsy winsy concerned. But not really much...

"This girl drives me crazy I swear!"

"I thought you like her?"

BANG! That hurt!

"Ouch!!! What was that for??"

Sitting on my back I have a painful look now. Zero just dropped me without any warning.

"Whoopsy..."

Did he smile?

"Idiot!"

"Wow, X is swearing! How cute!"

Now he smiles for sure!

"Why did you drop me??"

"You know X, I like you this way! Being a little rude after all! Not much, but it's a start! You're always so decent. That's okay, sure, but sometimes you should just let out your feelings!"

I gulp. That got me off guard. But he can't be talking about what I think he is right?

"I think I better go to bed now. Maybe I drank too much after all..."

I try to avoid his look.

"Okay then. I'll bring you to bed."

With this, he picks me up again and carries me to my room. When we enter I can't help but think of a freshly married couple whose husband is carrying his wife over the doormat. I chuckle.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, I just thought... wait!"

Suddenly I realize that would make me the wife. I'm no girl!! And I don't wanna be a girl!! Vigorously I shake my head. This must be very confusing for Zero.

"What are you doing?!"

"Nothing! I just don't want to be a girl!"

"What are you talking about?!"

"Do you think I'm girly?"

At last I could pay him back a bit for all the confusion earlier that day.

"Hum... no... not really. Well, maybe, sometimes. When you act touchy."

"I'm not touchy!"

"Yes you are!"

"Am not!"

"See?"

"..."

So much for this conversation. 1:0 for Zero. I should take conversation fights like this when sober...

Finally he drops me on my bed and gently covers me with my blanket. He sits down beside me, looking at me.

"So, have a good night, X! And try to get a little more sleep than last night, okay?"

"If I fall asleep at all that's already more than last night."

Good point. I think my mind comes back to me now. What reminds me... Zero just wanted to stand up.

"Wait!" I pull him back on the bed.

"What?"

"You said you might tell me what I said to freak you out earlier."

"Yeah, I said 'I might', not 'I will'."

He grins. That bastard! Hey did I really think that? I should watch out or else I'll be a swearing, rude person like Zero. Hm... not the worst when I think about it... after all I like this rude person very much... Hey, back to topic!

"C'mon Zero! Tell me!" I pout. That's his weak spot, just as mine, I know that. Only begging and pouting at Zero only gives me advantages, against me almost – no, really everyone can take advantage of it.

"Nah..." He tries to avoid my look. Failed. Ha!

"Okay okay! But stop looking at me like that!!"

I smile.

"Well?"

"Okay... it's not really a thing to freak out about like I did. It was just... damn you mentioned all along that I liked Iris and stuff. And then, on top, said that she's my girlfriend."

"Is she not?"

I look really innocent. After all, I've been sure about that.

"HELL NO! She's not!! And will never be okay?"

"Sorry, Zero... didn't mean to offend you by saying that, but... jeez I'm confused... I heard some girls talk about... well, you and Iris and your relationship."

"Which girls? I'll make sure they never say crap like that again!"

He looks scary.

"Zero, please! They didn't exactly say you're together, but from what I heard it was pretty obvious."

"What did they say?"

Whoops! What did I get myself into? I don't want to tell him that I've heard that they kissed. I couldn't stand the truth when he told me that was right. Even if he says that means nothing. Kissing is... well, we had that already... I sigh.

"What did they say I asked??"

He's stubborn. But I can see in his eyes he's really pissed because of those girls.

"Just forget what I said Zero, okay?"

I'm almost begging now. I don't want this conversation to go on. Or else I might hear something I don't want to hear... What if he doesn't want anyone to say they're together because he's about to ask her for it and doesn't want her to know before that?

Sometimes I really wonder how I make up such very adventuresome conclusions... It's like I want to believe they're a couple...

"Hey X! You're dreaming again! Don't avoid me!"

"W- what?"

"I still want to know what they said!"

"Better not..."

"You will!"

"I might... someday."

Yeah that was just so good! I'm a god! Got him with his own weapons! Ha! He sighs.

"Okay okay I got it! That point goes to you then! But our discussions not finished yet!"

"If you say so..." I look innocently at him again. That's 1:1.

"Guess I shouldn't discuss things with you when you're drunk. You're even more adroit then when you're sober! Who would have thought..."

He gets up and strides towards the door. When he takes the handle, he turns around again.

"Just want you to know one thing that's very important. And a question before that. So listen carefully okay?"

I look at him curiously.

"Yeah, what is it?"

"First, did you want me to date Iris or not?"

Why does he ask this?

"To be honest... no, I didn't want you to go out. But please, don't ask why..."

He nods.

"And second, I don't really like Iris as anyone seems to think around here... and less than ever love her! Okay? Did you get that?"

I look puzzled.

"You mean-"

"Good night X!"

And without letting me finish my question he leaves. I don't really know what I wanted to ask anyway. His statement was quite clear. But why did he point that out so vigorously?

Great, now I'm confused again! 2:1 for Zero...


	4. Confusion contest round 2

Ohhh I just have to start with the next chapter or else I burst!! At least I have to make some notes of some ideas that had come to my mind just now when finishing the last one -

Wow, that sure was a good night! I think I haven't slept so well for years. Maybe I should ask Zero to bring me to bed every night…

I grin to myself. I have this feeling there's a little chance he could like me just the same way I do like him. All this stuff he was talking about yesterday, asking me if I really not wanted him to go out with Iris. And especially pointing out he doesn't like her!

Although I could have sworn he does. He's been out with her so often, and due to all those rumours… Wait! Didn't Zero say it's simply not true? That they're together I mean? What if those other rumours weren't true as well.. But hey, why should Iris lie to her friends? At last the girls I overheard said Iris herself told them that she and Zero had kissed and stuff…

Maybe it's just like that. But this would mean that… a kiss doesn't mean anything to Zero when he claims not to be her boyfriend although they have kissed. Is Zero able to really love someone at all? I wonder… This thought somehow makes me sad.

Wah, don't think about it too much, X! Just get up, you had a wonderful night, the last one you saw before getting to sleep was Zero and he's definitely not Iris' boyfriend! What else could I want?

I jump out of my bed. It's at least comforting to know he's not having a girl friend either. If I can't be with him that way, no one else should! I even think I could stand it through this way… If he only would stop dating so many girls! I wouldn't really have to be in a love-relationship with him as long as he's just always around me and no one else… Yes, I think I could go for that. As being in another relationship than friendship with him seems impossible anyway…

I get dressed and leave my room looking for Zero. That's not too difficult as he already runs into me.

"Woah! X! Up so early? Hope you slept better than yesterday! You look a lot better today after all!" he smiles.

"Yeah, thanks to you!" I return his smile. He looks confused.

"Why me? What did I do?"

Whooops!

"Oh, nothing really. Just made sure that…. I really go to bed and stay there! Haha…"

Man I hope I'm not blushing right now! But he seems to take it. I gotta stop that stupid 'Haha'-laughs after trying to distract from something somehow!

"Oh. Okay. It seems you're much more relaxed than the last days. Might that be because of what I've told you last night?"

Gosh he's direct isn't he? I can't even think so fast to make something up to say that won't make the situation worse again. We've just gotten back to our normal behaviour!

"Noooo, Zero! What do you think of anyway?"

"Well, you looked very pissed the last days everytime the topic went to me and Iris. Now you know we're not together and stuff."

"Ohhh, that was just… I mean… " Damn!!! Think think think…. "You know, maybe I'm more relaxed now because… ehm… before I thought you really liked her and I was all confused when you told me you don't and now… ehm… I won't…eeeerrr…"

Damn damn damn!!! I had hoped something really good would come to my mind just while talking, or at least Zero interrupting me so I won't have to. But all he's doing is watching me curiously, waiting for me to continue…

"So, you won't what?"

He smiles. Bastard! Whoops swearing again! Who cares? He's gotta know pretty well that I never knew how to end that sentence… He just knows me too well. I sigh.

"Let's just forget about that okay? Imagine I was a girl – which I am OF COURSE not, and had my period okay? I just don't know what's gotten into me but it's over now and I don't want to think about it any more."

For a few seconds Zero just stares at me.

"What kind of speech was that?? Period?! X, you're sure you don't need a vacation??" He puts his hand on my forehead to feel if I have a fever. I shove it away, blushing again. Jeez gotta get that blushing under control sometime soon!

"I always need vacation! Who doesn't? Now stop it already!"

"As you wish." He shrugs, then grins. "I think I DO know what's up with you…"

I gulp. No, he can't! Can he…?

"What do you mean?" Do I sound unconcerned enough?

"Oh, you'll see!"

And with this he leaves me standing in the hallway. Whatever he's up to, this can't be good! Or maybe… I already thought about the possibilty he could feel that way for me because of what I've heard the last night. Hm… Since I decided that I can perfectly live with the fact that I can't have him, but as well nobody else can, I just wait for things to happen. It can't get any worse right? Whistling I leave for the head office.

…

"Good morning X!"

"Hey X!"

"Morning Signas, Alia."

Seems like there's nothing up today. Signas looks relaxed which he never does when Mavericks are about to attack. So I don't have to ask if there's something to do for me at all. But taking a second look at Alia, I knew that she's got something on her mind. She gives me that 'We have to talk'-look.

Normally I try to avoid such conversations, but as I'm in a real good mood today, I take the hint.

"Alia, I've got something I need to talk to you about. Ehm, about those new.. hum… armors!"

Alia looks astonished. As I expected, she didn't see this one coming.

"Oh, okay X! Let's go somewhere we can talk unhurriedly."

With this she escorts me out of the office. Signas seems quiet confused. I know why. There is no such thing as new armors… I bet anything he's checking on that right now believing he's going senile after all. I chuckle.

"X, I wonder. Normally you try to avoid talking to me. I mean, this way… You know what I mean."

"Yeah. This talking into my mind stuff." I grin. "I just happen to be in a good mood, so what's up? Something important?"

"Well, kinda… It's about Zero and Iris…"

For a second I almost skip a pace and trip, but I manage to avoid it. What is she talking about? Maybe I should have avoided her as I usually do…

"So, what's with them?" We reach her room and she opens it to enter. "Here?"

"Yes. If we're talking in you're room Zero might burst in. You know he's not exactly the polite one who knocks and waits for permission to enter when he visits you."

"He's my best friend, that's okay… I guess. And he sometimes does knock!"

"Yeah, whatever…" she closes the door behind us and offers me a seat. She prefers standing or walking around while talking. I feel like a criminal in an interrogation…

"What I want to talk to you about is… What happened yesterday?"

"What do you mean?" I'm shifting uncomfortably on my seat. How much does she know? Anyway, nothing bad happened, right?

"Hm… where to start? Well, I don't know what Zero and you talked about yesterday, but I'm pretty sure you DID talk. There must be a reason for Zero's behaviour this morning."

"What are you talking about Alia?!"

Confusion is my new favourite word I just decided! Now I'm really clueless what's up. Zero was the same happy nature as he usually is. He might be rough to almost anybody except me, but he's always still happy, making jokes – often at other's costs – and the only times I saw him really furious was when some maverick hurt me in battle. Maybe sometimes with Signas when he's annoying Zero. Thinking about it, I haven't even seen him sad ever before. I guess he's just good at hiding such feelings.

"X? Hello?" Oh shoot, am I daydreaming again?? I gotta stop that stuff!

"Yeah yeah, I'm listening! I just don't think Zero acted weird today…"

"So you already met him? I wonder what he's up to… But the problem is not only concerning him, as I told you, it's about him AND Iris."

"Will you eventually tell me what you mean?" I'm getting impatient.

"Alright. I have a slight idea of what you've been talking about with Zero yesterday. And I think that's the reason for what Zero did today. He… broke up with Iris."

That's all?

"You know Alia, breaking up a never existing relationship doesn't seem too sensational to me."

Now it's her turn to be confused. Got her! Haha!

"What was that?"

"Yesterday Zero told me they're no couple as some people seemed to think. So did I. He told me he doesn't even like her very much. I admit, that was a surprise to me as we-"

"He did WHAT???"

"Ehm… What's wrong?"

"So what's about all that dating stuff??"

"That's what I asked him. But he refused to answer. Maybe he just wanted to have some fun or show off?" What am I talking about here?!

"Oh poor Iris… Okay, this way, it looks a bit different…" Alia seems to think hard about something. I can't wait to hear it.

"What are you thinking about Alia?"

"X, the way they broke up – ah, you know what I mean, don't look at me like that! It's not like Zero just said he doesn't want to date her anymore… it was more like… running her down."

"How do you know?"

I can't really imagine Zero shouting at Iris like that. I know what he's like when he freaks out. But normally that only happens in battle or with Signas as I already said… But Iris? I don't know yet what exactly happened, but imagining Zero shouting at Iris like that… Iris must be devastated. Even I wouldn't want Zero shouting at me like that.

"I couldn't ignore it. He shouted so loud I could hear him perfectly well in the hallway… He was in her room, shouting stuff at her like she's talking nonsense, spreading rumours, and he definitely not wanting to be her boyfriend or anything near that."

That's not true is it?

"I… Are you sure?"

"See? I thought you would wonder as well. But I hoped that you at least had a possible explination for that. As I said before, I think it has something to do with whatever you talked about yesterday."

"All important stuff we talked about I told you already."

"Yeah… And it seems to me like Zero freaked out because you thought he and Iris were a couple."

I blush, and Alia grins. What the…

"You're really cute X! You blush quite a lot the last days don't you?"

"I – I don't know what you're talking about!" Quickly I look to the floor. Hm. I never realized the interesting pattern of Alias carpet…

"X, don't try to hide it! Not from me. I'm not as blind as others might be!"

"Still, I don't know what you're talking about!" Now I'm examining her desk. Pretty one…

"You can try but it won't help anyway. I know what's up with you. You like Zero… a lot!"

Can you blush even more?

"Really Alia, what's up with you??? Leave me alone! Zero's my best friend, of course I like him! That's all?"

I stand up. I don't want to discuss THIS.

"Calm down X, I won't tell anybody. But.. haven't you thought about that Zero might have acted like he did this morning because he likes you A LOT as well?"

She's grinning again. I don't intend on playing her game.

"Alia, you're a nice girl and all, but you really don't know me concerning this. I AM NOT in love with Zero, alright??"

"Did I say that? I just stated you like him A LOT … I didn't mention love…"

"But you were talking about that!!" Now I'm pissed. Alia finally seems to notice as her smile slightly fades.

"Okay okay big boy, you go! You don't like Zero A LOT, not to mention love, you're just friends. And Zero's behaviour has nothing to do with what you talked about. Thanks anyway! You may go!"

"Oh Alia, you're not my mother! Stop talking like that!" I head for the door and open it. "And once again, I think you're last statement was just a LITTLE ironic… I assure you there's completely nothing like that as you think of me okay?"

I managed to look very serious when saying that. No wonder considering how pissed I am. She finally seems to realize she's wrong.

"See X, whatever you might feel, I don't think it's fair to have Iris pay for all that. As far as I know, she really loves Zero… I don't want to blame you of course, but… just try to leave her out of that somehow."

"It's not my fault that Zero shouted at her or that she loves him… Are you finished now? No more talking about nonsense like I'm having a crush on Zero?"

But somehow I feel sorry for Iris… Anyway, I hope Alia's done now…

"Alright X. I believe you." She doesn't smile any more. Yeah, guess I managed to get out of it! So I smile and turn to leave.

"Bye Alia."

"Bye X!"

I close the door and hesitate for a moment. I might be mistaken, but I could have sworn she chuckled when saying bye…


	5. Surprise!

Fifth chapter… As I write I get the feeling this is going to be a longer fic I ever intended… It should be short but as I'm writing it I just get new ideas (or simply can't bring myself to stop writing what comes to my mind ;;) I just hope nobody's bored with it by now because the plot's not going on somehow… Please review and let me know! X's POV of course XD

I have to admit that Alia's got a point. But she doesn't have to know does she? I just decided to manage to live without having Zero for more than friendship and the last thing I needed was a curious girl who wanted to talk with me about my feelings…

Actually, she got more than one thing right. First of all, of course, my feelings for Zero. Big deal. But yet again, the way she thought about his behaviour. She, just like me, considered it possible that Zero felt something similar for me… If even Alia thinks so… She's a girl, and girls have a better sense for things like that, right?

But I should quit feeling sorry for Iris. Didn't Alia mention Zero saying something like 'spreading rumors'? So it was her own fault he got angry after all. Or did only those girls spread those? I think confusion is kinda my normal state now…

Somehow I got another thing on my mind, for a long time now, but I feel that I can't stand any more not knowing for sure. Does kissing mean something to Zero? I just can't imagine Iris made it up. Call me old-fashioned, but I still think kissing is something special and, as much as I insist on not being girly, I think I share this opinion with almost all girls in the world. Alia said Iris really loves Zero, so I think Iris thinks like that as well?

OUCH!

"Hey little man! I'm already blazing red like a traffic light and you still bump into me! You should get a drivers license for running around daydreaming!"

Zero! I can't help but smile on reflex when I see him. Though his statement was very true…

"I'm sorry Zero. I should save that dreaming for the nights. I know that."

"Oh, there are other good things you can do at night as well I guess."

He grins mischievously. I admit I'm a little afraid of that and back up a bit.

"Hey X, don't worry, I told ya already I wouldn't rape you, didn't I?"

Rape? What is he talking ab- WAIT! Now I know what he was –really- talking about, I just felt so awkward from his look that I didn't think about it! And now I blush. Here we go again…

"Haha, you're cute X, it's so easy to make you blush!"

"That's not funny Zero! Imagine I'd show such weak points in battle, no Maverick would be afraid of me any more! I've gotta learn to hide that and you provoking me all the time to blush doesn't help it in any way!"

What the -bloody hell- was I talking about?! Zero seems to think the same.

"I don't have the slightest clue what you are talking about X. But I got that part with Mavericks using your weak spot against you. If that's your only problem, it's just fine!"

"What do you mean?"

"Didn't I say I'm there anyway to save you? If you stick to my order not going off alone nothing will ever happen to you. Aw X isn't it just -wonderful- to have an own bodyguard? Especially ME the GREAT Zero??"

Now I just sweatdrop as I see him figuratively standing there, shining bright with twinkling stars surrounding him. He's really a jerk… Someone's gotta tell him.

"Zero, you're a complete jerk!"

Did I just say that?

"What? The almighty X dares to offend me?"

What is this leading to?! What's his point anyway? And aren't we getting a little off topic here?!

"If you're my bodyguard you should wear fancy sunglasses and a headset as well as a tuxedo."

"I already carried you to your room, remember? Now you just need to become a famous singing woman and everything's perfect!"

You can't believe how wide he smiles! He could have eaten a banana sideways! And I finally get furious.

"I already told ya I'm NO girl!!! But as it seems you think about me like that! Must be because I'm too decent, right? So I just cut that off, never show any concern for anything again and go ahead with swearing and stuff, just like you do. Because THAT's what's making you a REAL man, right??"

I can't believe how angry I got out of that acutally unimportant thing. And so does Zero.

"X, I didn't mean to offend you or something, I don't think you're-"

"Just leave it okay? I don't want to talk about that any more." Suddenly an idea stikes me. I'd take the chance!

"But why do I expect you to understand feelings without comparing it to be girly, for you don't have any right? I bet you'd even kiss anybody without having any feelings like you screw everyone who's not on the tree by the count of three!"

I think about what I've just said. Guess it was a little too rude maybe, considering it was ME who said that. But there was no better way to ask this question without being discovered. I just had to… decorate it a bit… I think…

"X…"

What's with this sad look? I couldn't have hurt him could I? He's tough. He always talks like this. Sometimes even to me and I'm faaaar more touchy than him! Uh that word again! No I'm not touchy!! I just can't stand knowing someone's angry with me or stuff… I still look at Zero. It's not so easy to look angry any more but I've gotta try. Damn he really looks hurt! What have I done! Just when I want to apologize, he continues.

"Do you really think about me like that? Having no feelings and such?"

"Ehm…." I'm kinda lost now.

"Guess it's my own fault." He laughs sarcastically. "Truly, I screwed lots of girls without liking them much, or even knowing them well. But… that doesn't mean I don't have feelings at all."

"Zero, I didn't want to-"

"No you're right. Yeah, you're damn right. I am a deadhearted bastard. Mostly, that is. But I'd appreciate you to believe me that I wouldn't do such a thing as kissing unless I really mean it. Though I can understand if you don't."

He looks really sad now. It's the first time I see him like this. I must have really offended him. Oh no what shall I do now?! I'm standing here at a complete loss. Somebody help!!

"Zero, I'm sorry! Really, I'm so sorry… the last thing I wanted was to hurt you… I… I'm just a stupid idiot…"

I don't know if Zero wanted to say anything more about that because I just turn around and run away. I doubt this is the best choice but right now I don't feel like I have any others.

Reaching my room, I enter it and lock me inside. I thought I would have to cry, I really felt like it. But somehow I couldn't. There were two feelings inside me that made me wonder. At first I was relieved when I heard Zero's answer. So he's not as cursorily as I feared, he thinks about kissing like something special! But all the same, I wasn't happy because that would mean if they really kissed…

But if they did and kissing meant something to him, why should he have told me he doesn't like her? Even more, Alia said he ran her down. Maybe he just freaked out because he thought she told everyone they're a couple and regretted the kiss. But that would still mean that…

It knocks.

"X? Can I come in?"

Zero. He's not giving me 2 minutes to think does he? I think he's doing this on purpose to bother me… Hey wait, I was the one who freaked out here… I feel guilty.

"Sure…"

He enters, closing the door behind him carefully.

"Can I sit down?"

"Sure."

I wonder if I will say a second word in this conversation…

"X, you didn't offend me with what you said."

I look at him doubtfully.

"Okay okay, you did!"

My mood drops instantly and he seems to notice, as he fumbles around with his arms waving desperately as if to tell me it's not true.

"Nonono, I mean, you did, but not as bad as you might think. And after all, it's my own fault as I said. All that stuff I use to do, who can blame you for thinking like that?"

"I can. And you."

"Oh stop it already! We're both old enough to talk in a rational matter, right?"

"Have you ever talked reationally to me?"

Why did I say that?? I'm doing it again!

"I-I mean when we talk you always seem to be away with your thoughts rather making fun of stuff than talking rationally!"

He smiles. I sigh in relieve.

"You're right. But you know what I mean I think. Let's just forget about what happened okay?"

"Okay, fine with me!" Very fine! I smile wholeheartedly. It's just great how we can talk. I don't know acutally why I was so afraid he would be angry with me for the rest of my life because what I have said. He's my best friend and friends forgive mistakes. Talking about that, I do that all the time with Zero… this was the first time I behaved stupid.

I get up.

"So, what shall we do now?"

He grins again. Wonder what he's up to.

"I've got a surprise for you."

"Surprise?? Really? What is it?" I'm sooo curious and he knows and enjoying it! Meany!

"Remember I told you I know what's bothering you? I arranged something."

Arranged? What was he talking about? What could he possibly know what's bothering me except for… NO! That just can't be! I instantly panic inwardly, luckily I don't blush again. He can't possibly talk about my feelings for him?! That's right, he already mentioned he thinks I'm jealous and he knows what's up with me! But how can he know? Please please let this be a nightmare and wake up! Wake up X!!!

Nightmare? I really wonder about myself sometimes. If it's what I'm thinking, I should be happy right?

"I admit it cost me quite an effort to arrange this. But for your happiness I'm willing to bear that."

I woke up from my inner soliloquy. Quite an effort? Willing to bear? What's this? Does this mean he… yes, definitely. Of course, he's not to happy about what I'm feeling for him, but to do me a favor he dates me anyway and tries not to show. Okay, telling me it cost him effort shows pretty well after all I guess…I don't care right now, as long as I can be with him! Although I should say it's not necessary if it's only an ordeal for him.

"Zero, whatever you're up to, it's not necessary if you're not fine with it. I don't want my best friend to suffer for my well-being."

Hello?! Didn't I JUST decided for myself NOT to complain?? Brain to mouth, you should say what I tell you!! Damn that conscience! It's always faster than my brain!

"No, no, it's alright!"

"Really?" Strike!!

"Trust me! But I hope you appreciate what I did for you as I don't think I'll do that EVER again!"

He looks so serious. Now I'm confused again. What's about this seesaw? If he doesn't want to go out with me like that or whatever he's planning to do with me, why doesn't he just say it?

"After this you've gotta get things going on your own, okay?"

He puts his arm in a brother-like way around me and dragging me to come with him. This last sentence makes even less sense than all the others. Gotta get it going myself? How come? If he doesn't want it at all, why should I go on?! Gahhhh confusion!! That makes already… where did I stop? I think it's 3:1 for him now! Time for the halftime! Give me a break! Help!!!

As we stride along the hallway I wonder where we go. I just can't wait anymore.

"Zero, mind telling me where we're going already or what you're up to? What is it you arranged??"

"Ah, X, you're sooo curious!" he smiles. But I can't deny I think his smile looks forced.

"Just tell me now or I'll… err…. I don't talk to you for 3 days… ehm… 2 days… maybe one… hour?"

"You've never been to good in blackmailing people X." Damn. He's right.

"But I'll end it here, I tell you what's up."

I smile. I'm so eager to hear it that I don't realize we reached a door where we stop. I don't care looking which one it is and wait for Zero to answer. Then he finally talks.

"X, you'll never guess, but I arranged you a date!"

"Really???" Gotta pretend I'm really surprised. I chuckle. Comeon, just tell me it's you and expect me to look really bewildered, which I won't. Heehee…. He turns me around and makes me to look at the door we were standing in front of, which opens just now and out comes…

"A date with Iris!" Zero finally says, Iris smiling widely.


	6. Dream Date or not?

Heeelloooo!! Since today's the fourth Advent today, I'll upload a new Chap for you And on Christmas (Saturday) You'll get the seventh!!! So only two more missing Yeah I actually had LOTS of fun with the last chapter, that's why it got so long I think… I just couldn't stop myself to protract that thing with Zero arranging a date for X with Iris chuckle Don't forget, I HATE Iris wholeheartedly!! But she's just a great character to use for the plot (every story needs an idiot. G That's why I'm making her like the silly, stupid little girl – which I think she actually is…) I hope no Iris-Lovers will flame me now ;;; Please review and tell me if you hate me now.

Oh and btw, I wanted to say something to  
some reviewers:

_Freaky person_: I just interpret you're still liking the story, right? Sorry to give you a heart attac with the last chap ;; Couln'T restrain myself kinda... XD

_Private:_ Ehm. well. Thanks for reading anyway if you don'T like Yaoi. But I just remind you I said in the first chap already that it'S yaoi, if you don'T like it, don't read it. And if you do, don't blame me. This is no offence, I feel complimented that you're reading it anyway XD But Don't be too sure to see through me. You don't know what Zero really knows or thinks. I'd like to tell you that I won'T change anything already written because of any comments, since the story is already finished (9 chaps,written in September I think..) So just wait and sees. Ah, and sure I know BnG XD Who doesn't?

_Gamegirl:_ Glad you like it XD Can'T wait for your last chapter!

_wandering life:_ Thanks, I love English but it's still not my mother language ;;; And as long as it'S good enough to read, I think it's okay. I hope it's not toooo bad ;;; I guess I confuse the tenses a lot. But I do that in any language when I write stories somehow ;;;

_Dark X and Dark Zero_: Yeah I'm MEAN XDDDD But hey I love X and Zero, do you reaaaally think I'd leave them like that? ... (Btw I love you too so get Zeal to update your story! XD)

_Vorzahk-vahki-tamer_: Well... thanks I will!

**So, that'S enough now, on with the story!-- X's POV…**

* * *

My jaw drops open. I don't even know if I should cry or laugh. This is just too paradox! He can't be serious! First I still stare unbelievingly at the sight in front of me. Iris. Smiling happily. Then I turn my glance to Zero, who seems to smile as well due to my expression. He must have loads of fun right now. 

"Zero…. That… you… I mean… are you serious?!"

"Just listen to him, isn't he funny?" He slaps me on the back laughing which causes me to fall over because he did it a little harder than he might have intended. I cough. After I get up again, he whispers to me now so only I can hear him.

"See X, you don't have to hide it anymore! I figured out that you must have a crush on Iris!"

"How would you?!" I almost yell at him. He looks surprised, still whispering.

"You ask? C'mon, I know you! That talking nonsense stuff, being jealous when I was dating her… It's just soooo obvious!" he grins.

I can't believe it… And all the time I thought he found out I'm jealous af HER and not of HIM. But I've been so sure he… hm… come to think about it. It's true. All the things I said, all my actions could also be seen as if I would have had a crush on Iris and not on Zero, not wanting them together and stuff. Maybe I just thought it the other way because I WANTED to believe he could like me the same way…

So it turns out that Zero just was so sad and disappointed in those situations because he thought he hurt me when being with Iris even if he didn't even like her and I did. So he thought. It's still nothing more than friendship for him. Big surprise. I should have known…

"So are you two going to stare at each other much longer or can we leave now, X?"

Iris. I shiver. What shall I do? It's already giving me the creeps she's here, and now going out with her?! NEVER! She's my enemy!!

I look at Zero. He seems kinda proud of his arrangement. He still seems to think he's done me a favour. I sigh. Okay, for Zero's sake… I can't disappoint him, can I? I force myself to smile. It hurts in my cheeks... Must look pretty stupid though.

"Okay then. Let's go Iris." I say that through gritted teeth. I just can't help. While leaving I turn around to Zero once again.

"Uhm… thanks… Zero… I guess…"

"You're welcome pal!"

He really thinks I'm happy now I guess… He's smiling after all. I turn around once again. What's that? Does he look down to the floor? Is there something? I can't see it from here, but as he notices I look at him he looks up and smiles again, waving happily. Maybe really something lying on the floor. Why should I care anymore? Now I gotta get this date over somehow… I sigh again.

So that's what he meant when he said he had to force himself to arrange that and that I would have to get it going myself afterwards because he wouldn't do it again. I can perfectly understand how it must have been for him asking Iris to date me after he yelled at her like that. I don't think he ever wanted to talk to her again after that.

Whatever, Iris seems to be happy. Wasn't she in love with Zero? Wait, why don't I put a good face on the matter and take my chance to find out something more about what happened between them? Yeah X, you're scaring me! You're turning into a real bad boy if you continue like this! Hey, didn't Zero say some time ago he liked me to be a bit more rude instead of too decent? That would be two birds one stone! Jeez, I'm really a god I guess…

As we're heading to the city, I try to start a conversation.

"Hey… well… so… how are you?" Great. I'm the master of conversation…

"Oh, just fine, thanks X!"

Yeah. Wonderful. Who cares? I don't even want to talk to her… I hate her!! But I gotta make this sacrafice in order to find out if she and Zero kissed… While I'm thinking we're passing that bar I was at with Zero the day before and I stop.

"You don't want to go HERE, do you?" Iris looks very disgusted.

"Well, where do you want to go?" I strongly supress the urge to slap her. Insulting OUR place like that!! This was where I got drunk and Zero carried me home… I sigh. I'm really losing it I'm afraid… thinking of this like a romantic memory of a walk at the beach or something… Now I chuckle.

"What's wrong with you X?"

"What? Did you say something?"

"Yes!! I just answered you're question and you're not even listening!"

Wheee daydreaming has its advantages I guess! Actually I think I could have lots of fun with Iris… of course in another way than she might like. Ahh I'm so evil!! Beeing a jerk is cool indeed! Maybe I never tried before because I don't want to be a jerk to Zero, and I almost only hang around with him. Well, I just decided to give it a try on Iris with being rude! Might get extra points from Zero for that.

"So, okay, what did you say?" She sighs.

"I said I'd like to go to that neat little café over there."

Oh man that's sooo typical…

"Sure, why not?" I force a smile. By now I already wonder how Zero could stand this… he dated her more than once and is way more tense than I am. And if he even really dislikes her so much, how could he survive dates with her? She's already driving ME crazy after a few minutes only!

Anyways, she happily grabs my arm and drags me into that café. As we enter, there are a few couples looking curious at us. Great. Now everybody here thinks we're together for sure … Even worse, everybody knows us… we're kinda famous… and some of them are already starting to whisper. Oh Zero I think I really understand how you felt… And I think I got a clue now how all these rumors came up…

"Let's sit down here!" She leads us to a table right in the middle of the café, looking around before sitting down. I'm so sure she took this table because everybody can see us perfectly from here. If I would have decided, we would sit somewhere behind a pillar or something…

The waitress comes to ask us what we'd like to drink.

"We'd like a milkshake, please!" Iris says. Did I just hear that?!

"Pardon me?!"

"You like milkshakes, right?"

"Well, first, I'd like to order on my own! Second, why only one milkshake for the both of us?? And third and most important: I HATE milkshakes!!"

Wow. Must have been good. Really EVERYBODY is watching us now. The stupid giggle from the waitress at Iris' order vanished immediately. Nobody's saying anything, Iris just looks bewildered.

"I'd like to have a beer. You have that?"

Strike again! Iris jaw drops under the table! I chuckle inwardly.

"Ehm… yes sir, sure…" The waitress gets away quickly. Iris still looks bewildered.

"X, what's wrong with you?! Since when do you drink beer?"

"Why do you wanna know? I like it. Period."

"I don't know you like this X… you act so… rude…" She looks sad. Normally I would feel concerned, but I don't. My pleasure if she's upset! Thanks to her Zero will probably never get the clue that I'm in love with him and not her… Which reminds me!

"Say, Iris, how come you're going out with me?" Now she looks confused. And she also blushes slightly. Man this behaviour is totally like me when I'm with Zero! I'm scared…

"Well.. Zero asked me if I'd go out with you because he thinks you would like to but don't dare to ask because you could think you're betraying him because I used to date him."

Let me get this straight. Just WHAT did he tell her?!? Gotta make a mental note to punish him for that! Jeez Iris must think I'm totally crazy about her! Hm. Okay, considering how I acted it's obvious I'm totally crazy about SOMEONE. Only Zero confused the target…

"But that's just it! You dated Zero all the time. I thought you love him? And now you're just going out with me all of a sudden."

"I don't really understand Zero as well… I mean, we had sooo much fun everytime we were out!"

I dare to doubt that. I wonder if the definition of "Fun" to Iris is another one than to Zero and me.

"But then…" Her look changes to really devastated. Maybe I shouldn't be AS rude… But only just a little nicer! Not much!

"Then what?" I try to sound calm.

"Well… don't know if you heard about it. But he yelled at me this morning very badly… and… broke up… I don't understand what's gotten into him! I thought he loved me!"

"Did you really think that?" I say this before I can even think about it.

"Yes, sure! Why do you ask? I mean, why would he have dated me all the time if we haven't been a couple?? Oh, now all my friends will laugh at me!"

She sobs. Great. What does she expect me to do now? Cheering her up? Serves her right. As far as I can see, she still believes they were together! So she actually did spread those rumors herself…

"Just what made you think you're a couple? Just going out sometimes? Haha, I mean that would mean you consider the both of us being a couple now as well! Imagine that! Haha!"

I really have fun at this thought. Nobody could really be that blue eyed, right? Wait! What's that? The way she looks… no… I gulp.

"You… DID think we're a couple because I'm going out with you… right?"

She doesn't say or do anything. I sweatdrop. What's with this girl?! She needs a psychiatrist!

"Listen Iris, you shouldn't make things like that up so fast! There's more to a relationship than dating!"

"Like what?"

"Jeez Iris! Are you trying to kid me??"

At this moment, the waitress comes, bringing our drinks.

"Thanks. Well, as I was about to say, you didn't mean that, right? I mean, are you really wondering why Zero freaked out?? How would you feel if someone told everyone you're in love with… let's say Douglas? Or Signas?"

"I would NEVER be in love with one of them!!! Isn't that obvious?? I'm way too cute for those… guys… who should believe such crap?"

"Well, when the concerned person itself is saying it?"

"But… but!"

"But what? Hey Iris, you understand pretty well what I'm talking about, you're not THAT stupid!"

Did I just say that? Actually I'm pretty sure she is…

"Of course I am not stupid! But what do you think there is more to a relationship, tell me!"

"Ehm, well.. for starters, there would be kissing…"

"And if there was?"

Hold it!! Hold it right there! Did she just say what I thought she said?

"Listen Iris." Now I look at her like a tiger who has cornered his prey. "Zero's my best friend, and I'm not very amused when there are rumors going around about him that make him feel bad in any way, understood?"

"Why should you care if we kissed? Wanna have him for yourself or what?!"

Eeeek!! If she knew how right she is! But hey, it's Iris, I don't really think she knows anything… Little fool…

"I care because he's my friend, as I said. And I know by chance that he wasn't to happy to hear that someone said you two kissed."

Okay, now it's out. Now she's gotta tell me the truth and I'll finally know! Iris looks very serious now.

"I didn't know this date was about talking about past relationships between me and Zero."

If I may mentally correct: never existing relationships. Thank you for listening.

"And what we did is completely our thing, no one else needs to know! That's private."

Hmph… dead end… But somehow I gotta get it out of her. I'll try the other direction.

"Okay Iris, I'm sorry. Let's just forget about that. How about finishing our drinks and go somewhere else? I mean, after all, if you were willing to go out with me, you must like me at least a bit, right?" I put on my sweetest smile. Got her!

"Oh X, you're so cute! I knew you'd understand!" She giggles. ARRRGG I still hate that! I force another smile with gritted teeth and almost break some by doing so.

We finish our drinks and leave the café. She links her arm with mine. Arg what other things do I have to do to get it out of her?!

"So, where do we go now X?"

"Anywhere you want." God I think I gotta puke.

"Ah you're sooo polite!! Zero never let me choose!"

"He didn't?" Guess he's more consequent than I am. After all, he's got the pride to stick to his opinion, as I am losing mine right now in playing Mr. Nice-guy to Iris…

"No, never. Come to think about it, I wonder why he even dated me all the time. I reaaally liked him you know, I mean, I wouldn't have kissed him if I didn't, but-"

"So you did?!"

Oh no! She said it… Well, my plan worked… Are girls always so weird?! If you ask them about something they just refuse to tell, but if you change the topic or don't show any interest, they'll tell you anything unasked…

"Yes. But that's not the point, because you know, Zero can be soooo weird sometimes! You're his friend so you sure know! Jeez why doesn't this guy give himself and others an easier time? I mean…"

And so she continues babbling. I already stopped listening since she mentioned that kiss. I can't believe it… Till the end I was sure it was just a rumor. And since Zero said kissing means more to him… Maybe he dislikes her know, but as it was for this kiss, he must have liked her before. Well, shouldn't I be fine with that? But maybe he's just making all this "I hate Iris" stuff up because he really thinks I love her and doesn't want to be in my way? Oh Zero, why don't you just tell me what's up with you? You're so weird in your actions sometimes!

"X! Hey X, are you listening??"

"Ahhh, yeah, sure! Just continue…"

"Ah okay, well, as I was saying, that one day, I just asked him politely if he thought the color of my hat matches my eyes, he just was like 'who cares, nobody's looking in your eyes anyway'. Can you imagine that? Ha! Not quite the Mr. Romantic, don't you think X?"

I nod, but I'm already off in my world again. Just let her talk. And while she does, I don't know where we're even going. But hey, why do I do this? I shake my head.

"What's the matter X?"

"Sorry Iris, I gotta go…See ya!"

I'm running away, leaving Iris behind. I just can't stand her anymore now, not today. I need to think about what I've heard.

Let's analyze the gathered facts from today. First of all, they kissed. Great… and second, Iris is annoying like HELL! I can imagine very well how Zero felt. But I still don't get why he dated her again and again if he dislikes her so much as he's saying. That wouldn't fit to the kissing fact as well. So I'm pretty sure my conclusion about him really liking her is right, but he only wants me to be happy and makes it look like he hates her so I don't feel bad for dating Iris… I mean, even if she's annoying and he acts rude… he always acts rude, that's just like him, and when you love someone you kindly ignore the weaknesses of the other one. Jeez I'm just so good at making such conclusions. Wonder if it's right. But hey, all facts combined this is the most likely to be true.

The other possibility would be, he REALLY hates her and always did and thinks I'm in love with Iris and he wants me to be happy. But then it wouldn't have been for the kiss. Damn this kiss, it's giving me a hard time to think about it!! Isn't there a third possibility? That he likes me actually? I guess there might, but it's a chance around 0,046 or something… there are too many facts against that. He would NEVER arrange a date with Iris for me if he was in love with me right? Because IF he was he would have realized already days ago that I love him, there were so many hints! He would just have to take one, but he didn't. So if he got it, he ignored me because he doesn't feel this way, and if he didn't get it, he can't feel anything for me anyway because he would have realized then. Right?

Oh my god, if anybody could hear me think! They'd put me into a nuthouse right away! But well, can't I start to get over it right now? Now that I can be pretty sure Zero's not feeling for me this way? Jeez, I'm afraid I still need to hear it from him. Damnit. This'll take forever!

I finally reach HQ. And sure enough, the first person I'm running into, is Zero.

"OUTCH!"

"Are you planning to make a record out of it?" Zero smiles.

"Out of what?!"

"Out of running into me all the time! By the way, did you get that drivers licence thing a thought?"

"Oh just stop it Zero, will ya? My day was bad enough."

"Oh really??" he looks like he's setting free balloons any second now, throwing a party. I look at him like he's lost his marbles.

"What's with this happy look?"

He seems to realize that this behaviour is out of place and quickly changes his expression to very concerned.

"Oh, sorry, just… ehm.. a joke! Yeah, a joke I heard today and can't stop thinking about it! Haha!! Ehm.. cough well, how was your date with Iris? Not too good the way you look I assume?"

Is it just me or does he surpress another grin? Must have been a really good joke. He's gotta tell me some day.

"No, not at all if you wanna know… She's hell annoying!! I don't have the slightest clue how you could stand all the dates with her! You're way more impatient than I am!"

"See? Told ya I don't like her and now you know why…"

Hm? So maybe it is the second possibility I had in mind, that he really dislikes her… he sounded pretty serious. Well, but still, the goddamn kiss!! ARG!! Brain damage!!

"Sorry Zero, I think I better go to bed… I don't feel like… well.. anything now.. Just want to sleep and get my mind off things…"

"What things?"

"Since when are you so curious?"

"Oh, never mind… I'll escort you if you don't mind. You.. ehm… might fall asleep before you get there, so your bodyguard better be there right?"

He smiles again. He really seems happy about something.

"Hey, tell me the joke!"

"What?"

"That joke! Must have been a real good one, you're still smiling! I wanna smile too!"

"Ehm…"

I look at him like a little boy, pouting.

"C'mon! No fair keeping it for yourself!"

"How could I resist you. You look soooo cute when you're pouting like that! Sure, I'll tell you!"

I stop. Did he say resist? And cute?

"You think I'm cute?"

Hey I'm not blushing!! I'm progressing! But funny enough, Zero does. I NEVER saw him blush before!

"Well, ah, you know what I mean right? Hehe, so about that joke, it was "At night it's colder than outside" HAHA isn't that great??"

"…"

He sweatdrops. This must be the worst joke I ever heard…

"Zero?"

"Yes…?"

"That wasn't a bit funny."

"Maybe that's the funny thing about it?"

We both look a bit lost now. After a minute or so, we burst out in laughter. I haven't laughed so hard in such a long time! It feels good! And Zero's sharing this moment with me…

We reach my room.

"Well, good night then, Zero. Thanks for escorting me. I think everything's alright now."

"Yeah sure." He smiles, but then the smile fades and is replaced by a concerned look.

"X… I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings earlier when smiling like an idiot while you seemed pretty upset from your date… I didn't mean to. Really."

I'm astonished. Why does he care so much for that? I already forgot. After all, I wasn't upset because of the date…

"It's okay Zero. I don't blame you for anything. Well, maybe only-" I cut myself of. No, I can't tellhim I'm a bit angry that he told Iris I'd like to date her and don't dare to ask and stuff and making her think I like her. He did this just for me, thinking he's doing me a favor. If I tell him this now, he might be down thinking he did the wrong thing. Well okay I already said she's annoying… But well, I don't want him to be down. He seems so happy just now… Plus, we just got back to our old relationship. I don't wanna lose this again.

"Only what? Tell me!"

"No, it's okay, it's nothing!"

"It's not! You wanted to say something! It's important for me to know! How can I promise to get better if you don't tell me what I did wrong?"

"Really Zero, it's okay. Trust me!" I give him the warmest smile I have. That seems to soothe him.

"Alright then, I won't bother you by asking any more. Have a good sleep, X."

"You too! Night!"

I enter my room and don't take another look at Zero. Although I felt amazingly great when he returned my smile I just gave him, I can't help but feel that my heart is torn apart somehow. For I will never get to hold him or being held by him like I wish it could be…


	7. Sweet dreams

Hi everyone and a meeeeeeeeerry christmas to all of you!!! XD I know most of you might celebrate christmas tomorrow, but hey, since I get my presents today, I thought, why not giving you this chap as a present today as well? XDWell, on to other stuff!

Man I gotta end this some time soon! It was never meant to get this long! OO gets headache But well, I still hope there are some people liking this, regarding the reviews there are XD. You get all my respect if you lasted till here! Ganbare,there'll be an end soon!

* * *

Again I'd like to say something to the reviewers, but to all of them: THANKS FOR READING AND LIKING IT!!! I LOVE YOU ALL!! Getting your reviews makes me want to write another fic XD But well, I think I'll stick to my usual fanfic-style after this again...

blahgirl: WEll, here you go XD I'm updating

obsessed-and-can't-spell: Yeah, now I hope your christmas ROCK since this is rockman! (slap me...) btw, great name XD

D.X D.Zero: I hope you don't suffer too much XD And say hi to Zeal

PRivate: Oh sorry, guess I really got you wronG! Thanks anyway! I'm glad you like it though you'Re not into yaoi! That really means something I guess I'll upload another FF soon which is completely not yaoi and just plain stupid, maybe you'll like it

Freaky PErson: AHHH I'm always happy when I get your review!!! You make me smile like an idiot! XDDD I so hope you'll like it till the end! (cause I don't really like the end --)

Now have fun! And sorry if I wrote nonsense sometimes here like where they didn'T belong. Yesterday I a´lmost cut off my finger while putting a cup into the cupboard, so I can't type quite well now... Merry christmas I guess ;;

Have fun, as always, X's POV

* * *

"Zero, watch it!!! A maverick behind you!!"

"Ahh, thanks X!! Could have ended bad!" he gives me thumbs up, the next moment he jumps over me, killing another maverick that was about to get me.

"Jeez, thanks as well Zero!"

"You're welcome, my love!"

"WHAT?"

"Aw, X, don't look like that! You know I love you don't you? Everytime I hear this knocking I think of you!"

"Knocking? Love? Zero what are you talking about?!

"Don't you hear it? The knocks of love!" Suddenly Zero changes from his armor to a fancy colored shirt and flares, stupid glasses and looking like a hippie.

"What the…?"

"Make love not war!!" Now he's throwing flowers… What the hell is going on here? Wait! Now I hear that knocking as well?!

"Zero, you're scaring me! What's up?!"

"Everything will be fine, worry not my dear!" He comes over to me, and gets out drumsticks. I wonder what he's planning to do with those. He's taking both in one hand now.

"You hear the knocking now??" And with this, he's beating me with those sticks on my head like mad. But before I can complain or ask what he's doing, I wake up…

"The hell…" I rub my head. What kind of sick dream was this?! And what about this knocking?

"X, are you awake?!" I turn to look at the door. It's Alia's voice, and she's knocking on the door. So that's it. Aww I feel like I've been drinking all night…

"Sure Alia, come in…"

She enters my room.

"X, what happened? You look awful!"

"Oh thanks…"

"No, you know how I mean it! Like you had a bad dream or something."

I still got this disturbing picture of hippie-Zero in my mind.

"Not bad but completely stupid! Well, whatever, sit down if you like."

I sit up on my bed while saying this, she sits down beside me.

"Where have you been all day? Didn't see ya around anywhere yesterday. Not even with Zero."

"What's that supposed to mean?!" I ask alarmed. She chuckles.

"Nothing… just, where have you been? Everything's alright?"

"Depends… I had a date with Iris…"

"You had WHAT???" Alia looks totally bewildered. Obviously, she thinks this is a joke.

"It's no joke if you think that. Zero arranged it."

"Zero did WHAT????" Now she almost fell off my bed. Oh, correction, she just did…

"That's not true, you're kidding me!!" She says from the floor, looking up to me sitting there.

"Yes it is. But you're expression is pretty much the same as mine was."

"I can't believe that, how come??"

"Well, as I found out he must think I'm secretly in love with her because he figured I've been jealous all the time when he was with her and stuff, and so he wanted to do me a favor in getting me a date with her."

"Has Zero gone maverick?! Or does he just like to torture you? I mean, it's sooo obvious you're jealous because you love HIM and not Iris, right?"

"Well, tell that Zero! He doesn't get a hint if you'd wack it in his face you know!"

I'm mumbling while saying this. But Alia's smiling now. Just what's so funny about all this right now all of a su- wait! HELL NO!!! What did I just say??

"No!! Alia, whatever I said, it's not true!! I- I am… I mean I am not! Oh shit…"

"Got'cha."

She smiles victoriously. Bitch!

"Hmph… you're evil, Alia."

"Yes, I am. So? I told you already that I figured it out, and now you finally affirmed it. I just had to get you off guard in a mood like this."

"Are all girls this calculating?"

"Most of us."

"Great. Guess Iris's not a girl then?"

"What you mean?"

"She's just too stupid for things like that… I mean, she thinks having a date with someone makes them a couple right away!"

"Doesn't it?"

I'm looking at Alia in disbelief. She starts to laugh.

"Just kidding! Hey, I don't know her too well after all I guess… Never talked much with her. I'm too busy most of the time, and when we talked all she said was how she loved Zero and that he loves her. Guess I was a little naïve."

"Not more than me…"

I sigh. Alia puts her arm around me. Normally I would have shoved it away, I don't like being pitied by others – well, despite Zero. But somehow I feel there's something new between Alia and me know. Something like trust only good friends share. I wonder why I always refused to talk with her like this. She seems to be really understanding and concerned about my situation.

"Alia.. I'm sorry."

She looks at me confused.

"What for?"

"That I was a jerk to you all the time. You're really nice you know. I just didn't want to talk to anybody about it. Thought I could handle it myself."

"Everybody does…" She sighs. "But after a while most realize that it's easier to have someone to talk to. And other point of views from situations. And some might come up with good ideas."

The expression she has now slightly scares me.

"What are you up to, Alia?!"

"Don't know yet… First you should tell me what happened yesterday in detail!"

"Ehm… well.. okay…"

After about 10 minutes I told her everything so far. But she seems to notice I left out a bit. Must be this damn women's intuition.

"X… what else happened? You can't tell me that's all. I mean, you told me you didn't know what to think and how Zero feels and were really upset, but why? All you told me so far wasn't a reason for this. Zero told you he dislikes Iris, Iris told you she just made up this couple thing only because they dated… all this should make you feel happier right?"

"Well…" She's right. I left out the part with the kissing…

"Come on X, how am I supposed to help you if you're not telling me?"

"You're having lots of fun right now, don't ya?" I look annoyed.

"Actually, yes, I am." She smiles even more. "Now tell me!"

"Okay then… To make it short, Iris told me she and Zero DID kiss…"

"And you believe this piece of crap?"

Now there's silence. Then she continues.

"Well.. to be honest, I don't believe that… You said Zero thinks of kissing like you do, so that would mean… oh I get it now what makes you so sad. Well but… as I said, I don't think that's true, 'cause I'm pretty sure Zero is meaning what he says about disliking her."

"But…"

I don't know myself what I want to say. Alia seems to understand as she's putting her arm around me again. She's really a nice girl. At this very moment, the door opens and Zero comes in.

"Hey, mornin' X, had a good sleep? Wanted to ask if ya-"

He suddenly stopped talking when he realizes that Alia's here as well.

"Ah… good morning Alia… Up so early? So… you don't seem to need a third person here… I'm off then…"

"Zero wait, you're getting this-" Alia starts, but Zero already turned around, leaving my room at incredible speed. "-wrong…"

I can't help but shake my head.

"X I'm sorry…"

"No. It's not your fault. This was so bound to happen! Arg sometimes I could just slap him!! Who does he call touchy??"

"He did?"

"Yes…"

"Hm… Hey, wait! Say, the way he acted he really makes the impression to me he's jealous!"

"What? Don't tell me he's in love with you now!" I look shocked.

"Oh X I really should beat you up for being so stupid! Please tell me you're not meaning this seriously!"

"Ah well…"

"X, honestly! He can't be jealous all the time because you accidentaly always date only those girls he has a crush on right?"

"Why not?"

Man I think she might really slap me any second! Maybe I should try to talk me out of it?

"Maybe he's not jealous, maybe he just… ehm… thought he interrupted us in something and didn't want to disturb?"

"X!!! For heaven's sake, use your common sense!! You're blaming Zero for not noticing your hints that you love him, but here you are, telling yourself nonsense about him loving anybody you get close to! Isn't it waaaay more likely that he just wants to be with YOU and he's jealous when he sees you with others like this?"

Well.. I gotta admit it. The way Alia points this out, it sounds really sensible. I wonder why someone else has to say it to make me believe it. For I already considered this possible days ago…

"But Alia, there's still the kiss…"

Now she's rolling her eyes. I'm really afraid she might slap me now! But she isn't. Lucky!

"X, will you please stop thinking about this stupid, goddamn, probably never happened kiss between them?!"

"What do you mean, 'probably never happened'?"

"You know pretty well what I mean, please stop acting the dumb here! Iris said that and she was furious about Zero. Plus I consider it possible she just wanted to make you jealous."

"But she said that when I didn't ask for it, she even said that only casually."

"Well okay, that might give us a bit to worry, but not much. DON'T LOOK LIKE THAT!! I said just a bit!! Jeez… Let's just pretend now this kiss never happened for our plan, okay?"

"What plan? Alia, you're scaring me!"

"Well, the plan we will make if we assume Zero's in love with you! Something to test it!"

I back off a bit. Girls sure are scary! Her eyes are glowing!! Okay, I think I'm really getting paranoid now…

I pause for a minute. She seems to wait for my agreement.

"Well, how about finding out first if it has been for that kiss?"

SMACK! Yeah now I got it… She finally slapped me…

"OUTCH!! Now what was that for?!"

"X you're pathetic!! Just forget about it okay?? You'll ruin everything if you ask him okay??"

"Why that?"

"Cause, think about the possibilities! First would be, you ask him, it's true, then you're even more down. That's not necessary. Aw, don't look like that, it's not true anyways!!"

"So why don't ask him if it's not true anyways as you say?"

I think I'm driving her mad. Actually, I think I'm as annoying to her now as Iris was to me yesterday… Aw please no!!! I don't wanna be like Iris! I wanna be a god again! What am I talking about!?

"Well, that's where the other possibility comes in. You ask him, it's not true, but he feels offeneded because you even considered believing her by asking him again. He might think you don't trust him."

"That's bullshit!!"

"Well, yes, but listen, you two happen to behave more weird than ANY other person I've ever met when you're in love! If you ask me, EVERYTHING's possible here."

"We can't be weirder than girls!"

"Oh yes you can! Trust me! You're worrying way too much! And think about it, nothing ventured, nothing gained! One of you finally has to make the first move! Or this'll go on forever!" (author's note: I think Alia's talking out of all the reader's minds ;;;)

I finally give up. Alia's right. But I'm not very comfortable with ME being the one with the first move…

"So what is your plan?"

"Just let me do it. You lean back."

She stands up and smiles at me. I'm still not fully convinced. This is bound to go wrong… Alia's heading for the door.

"Thank you, Alia."

"You're welcome X. I just can't see you two suffer anymore, it's awful! Well okay, not that Zero changed much, he's moody as always… but you're looking so depressed all the time instead of being the cheery, usual X I know pulls me down. I want you to be happy. So, get up now, have breakfast and start the day. See ya later!"

And with that, she leaves. Funny speech. But I'm already feeling better. She was right, it actually DOES help to have someone knowing and who you can share you're thoughts with in this case. Usually Zero's always the person I'm talking to when I got something on my mind. But it's clear that that's impossible in this special case. I just wonder what plan Alia has. Coming to think of how she already scared me earlier, it's giving me the creeps… Please let Zero still talk to me after it! --


	8. The ultimate plan

Chapter 8!! Yeah I'm REALLY planning on getting this done soon! Actually, this is the second-last chap! Ehm... second-last.. that sounds so wrong... why isn't there a word for "vorletzte"?? Well, altogether there are 9 chaps so you know what I mean now XD

So rejoice becauseyour ordeals might have an end soon XD But I'm thinking of an epilogue.. some kind of one chapter sequal… (well knowing me it'll be 3947 chapters in the end) Well, depends if you'd like to have one. I'll ask when I'm done with this. But for a change I wrote a humor-yaoi-really stupid Rockman FF today (my usual style... just plus Yaoi XD) because I was bored. I wonder if I should translate it and post here...) It's with X, Zero and Axl. Anybody interested?

And again, some statements to the reviewers:

RemmZ: Your begging has been heard Here you are! XD

Gamegirl: Rude X? Are you talking about your FF? I'm not intending on turning X rude here, it just doesn't fit... I'll mail you as soon as I'm home, have been gone over the holidays!

DarkAnimus: Thanks a lot XDD I always love to hear that people like the crap I'm writing here

D.Zero D.X: Thanks for the Link! Didn't have the time to look yet, but since I'm back to work now I will see it rather sooner than later!! Hope you like the outcome of this fic -- I suck... bows down to Zeal

Private: You review's not bad! I love it! I always love your reviews because I'm always curious if you still like it with all that Shounen-ai XD Don't worry, it'll end soon XDD I know I'm awful with stretching the storyline ;; Btw, I've got a humor FF from Rockman as well, it'll be on my page when it's updated sometime... I might upload it here as well. No Yaoi at all, maybe you'll like it

Freaky Person: Thanks for your support! I'll try my best! (well, a little late since it's already written cough) But I hope you'll like the ending more than me. It's REALLY awfully fluffy I'm afraid ;;;; (as if nobody would have guessed...) Only one more chap to go now!

Thanks to anyone reading this btw, I love you all! XD

So no more hesitation, X's POV

* * *

I stride along the corridors, Alia just left. I still wonder what plan she might have. I have to admit, Alia's surprising me! She knew lot of stuff I never thought she would have realized! I think if it was her I was in love with she would have already known before me… 

I head for the cafeteria. Gotta get something to eat…

As I walk in there, I see some rookies talking, nothing unusual. But wait, there's Zero! Sitting alone at a table in a corner. As always. Just as I said, nothing unusual here. I get myself some cornflakes and walk over to him.

"Hey Zero. Long time no see!" I smile at him, but he looks like the milk he just drank was acid.

"Where's Alia?"

"Ah, don't know. Off to work I assume."

"So your little date is already over?"

"There was nothing about a date, we just… talked."

"About what?"

"Well… I don't wanna talk about it. Stuff I have on my mind lately…"

Now he looks pissed.

"What's wrong with you Zero?"

"What do you think?!"

"Is it because I talked to her and not to you?"

"YES! EHM, NO I MEAN!!! It's something else!! Of course!"

"Zero, you know I always talk to you about my problems and such, but in this case… I just can't, I'm sorry. Plus, I don't want to bother you with my problems all the time…"

That's so true. Must be hell for Zero listening to my whining all along, mostly about my dislike for being a Hunter.

"No, I'm sorry X. For acting so weird, I just… ehm.. thought I cought you in the middle of something… disturbing… you know…"

Now I laugh. So I was right after all! Wait till Alia hears this!

"I just wondered X. Did you really want to go out with Iris? I think I might have made a mistake by arranging that. I only wanted to do you a favor, I thought you liked her…"

"Hey, it's okay, it was the thought that counts. You just meant well.

"Sure… Want my little buddy to be happy after all!" Now he smiles again. "Because I just realized this morning that I've made a mistake. Think I got it wrong who you are in love with!"

I gulp. No!! Not again! Did he find our after all?? Just be calm X….

"Oh yeah? So who do you think it is?"

"So I am right? There actually IS someone you like??" He looks totally excited.

"Ehm, yes… actually…"

And now I'm blushing again. Well, guess I made it a long time without blushing already… at least a little progress… Everything has an end right?

"I knew it!! Yeah, I should have known really! I mean, no one with all his senses together could ever fall for that nag Iris right?"

"I suppose so…" I smile with a sweatdrop. What is he up to?

"Haha, alright. So just tell me if I should help you to get a date with Alia! But you seem to get along very well on your own already, right?"

Is Zero really that stupid or is it just me? Back to my imposter theory… This simply CANNOT be Zero! This guy, whoever he is, got Zero's body and obviously is not blessed with something like a brain or keen perception. Right, as Alia said, I might be a little naïve as well, but this is ridicolous! And imposter-Zero – hey, I wonder if he might be the hippie-Zero of my dream – just continues grinning stupidly. I'm tempted to just stand up and walk away… But I don't. Let's give it a try to give imposter-Zero the chance not to make the same mistake twice.

"Listen, impo- ahhhh Zero! I'm N O T in love with Alia, okay? Got me? Please DON'T arrange anything!"

Now he looks beaten.

"Aww… I was so sure…hm. I'm sorry. It seems you actually DO like Iris and my talking about she's being a nag and nobody with all his senses could like her just daunted you so you just said you dislike her."

I punch his head.

"OUTCH!! HEY YOU LITTLE – "

"Zero, would you KINDLY stop talking such crap now? I really – hey, wait!! What are you doing??"

Zero suddenly grabbed me and threw me over his shoulder like I was some kind of baggage. I start pounding on his back.

"Let me down Zero!! What's wrong with you?!"

"Wrong with me? Who just punched me? Better take care of you before you seriously hurt someone or yourself."

"ZERO!!! L E T M E D O W N!!!"

I'm a bit desperate now… All the rookies are watching us as Zero is walking calmly out of the cafeteria with me over his shoulder. He even has the nerve to whistle!! Some rookies are chuckling. It's so embarassing…

After a while, nobody of us said a word so far, I try to find out what this is about.

"Zero… sorry if I'm interrupting you at something, but do you consider it possible within the next days to let me down again?"

"Hm. I'll decide later."

So much for being polite. Hey, at least nobody can say I didn't try!

"HELL ZERO LET ME DOWN THIS INSTANT YOU GODDAMN JERK!!!!"

Wow! Did I just say that? All on my own?

"Hm. Well, not really the best, I know you can do better than that."

"Than what?!" I'm confused. What is he talking about? He doesn't seem concerned one bit about what I said.

"Cursing. Swearing. Okay, you're still learning, but you can do better, I'm sure!"

He's outmatching me. No doubt. I could give up right now.

"Okay Zero, you won! You can let me down now! I'll do anything you want okay?"

"Anything??"

I frown. What does he mean?

"HEY GUYS! There you are!!"

Zero stops dead in track. I just can assume why. That cheery, AWFUL voice came from Iris… Right now I'm THANKFUL Zero didn't let me off yet so I can't see her.

"We were already looking for you."

Huh?! That was Alia?! Alia and Iris? But what?!

"And who are you? Didn't I see you somewhere before?" Zero asks with a very devaluing undertone.

"I'm Sara, a friend of Iris. Teehee!"

Oh my good!! Stupid giggling girl!! I'm sure I know this giggling!! Sounds like one of that girls I overheard talking about Iris and Zero that day! Man I wanna know what's going on here!! I can't see!!

"Ehm.. Zero.. won't you let X down already? It's not quite.. ehm… amusing talking to his butt…"

Oh thanks a lot Alia! That's absolutely NOT embarassing in ANY way… Irony is flying low today… But hey, it worked! Zero lets me down finally. And I turn around.

"Oh. Hi…"

I was right. It WAS one of those girls. Actually it was the one that said that Iris and Zero have kissed. OH how I hate her…

"Alia, what's going on here?"

I hope she's explaining this now. I'm sure this has something to do with her plan. But I assumed – and sure HOPED – she would tell me what her plan is about BEFORE she starts it… she can't explain it in front of Zero, right?

"Oh, after our little talk this morning, X, I thought what we could do. And I had the ultimate idea!"

NO!! Please Alia!! Don't talk about our conversation!! I'm shaking my head nervously, but not to much, hoping only she gets the hint.

"I really don't think you have to be ashamed X. It's totally okay! And I thought I could make it easier for the both of you!"

Now she smiles at Zero. ARRGG I'm SOOO gonna pay her back on this!!! And I trusted her!!

"You two are best friends and sharing so much! And you should trust each other!"

What's this about?! Please stop Alia!!!

"So I thought about arranging another date."

Alright, I'm ready to strangle her! Here we go!

"Actually, it's a double date!!"

She smiles happily when she sees our confused expressions. I stop dead in my start to strangle her.

"Pardon?" Zero and me ask at the same time. Holy cow, Alia, what are you up to?!

"See, Since neither of you is coming out with his true feelings I thought I'd help a bit. I don't know who Zero likes, but I sure know who X likes. So I arranged this to give you a little start-help to get it going finally! As you don't seem capable to do it on your own."

The last sentence had a sliiiightly reproachful undertone… And damn, I think I blush again! And so does Zero. But why him?! Could it be… oh no don't tell me he likes that stupid Sara-girl! Or after all, Iris?!

"You guys will go out with these.. ehm… ladies tonight, understood? Iris will be X's date, Sara will be Zero's. And the four of you will have loooots of fun finding out how fuuuunny it can be having fun with the other's partners as well and they don't intend to take your friend away from you alright? And pleaaase be so kind and don't hide your feelings any more!"

I'm totally dumbfounded… what the HELL has gotten into Alia?! Not that I only did not get ONE word of that last speech, but, hello??? With this action she's pracically telling Zero I'm truly in love with Iris!! As she stated she know perfectly well who I have a crush on and she plans to get us together! Oh lord please let me die a quick and painless death! Or better, let Alia die a loooong and paaaainful death!!!

"Haha, will you excuse us just a second??"

I grab Alia's arm and go a few meters away from the others, out of ear-shot. Then I start talking to her desperately.

"Alia!! What's wrong with you?? Are you on drugs?! I thought you wanted to HELP me!!!"

"Aww… X…" She shakes her head, putting her hands on my shoulders. "I knew you wouldn't understand. But trust me, it's all according to our plan!"

"OUR plan??? As far as I know I'm not adepted in ANY of YOUR adventerous plans!!!"

"For a purpose! It wouldn't work if you were!"

"How come?!"

"Trust me X. Just trust me. Okay? Now go, have fun! And remember what I told ya! Don't hide your true feelings any more!"

With that, she walks away, leaving me standing there like a complete idiot. Showing my true feelings, yeah? So do you want me to just walk back there and say 'Well, I'm sorry, but I can't date Iris, 'cause I love Zero.'? NOOOO way!!! Oh man Alia's sooo gotta make up for that tomorrow! But now I somehow gotta get this over with…

"Hey X, did she say what this shit's about?!" Zero whispers to me as I come back. I just shrug.

"Well… I guess.. we gotta get ready then…."

"X???? You don't wanna tell me you're going to take this double-date-nonsense???"

"Well… I might be wrong… but I trust Alia… Maybe you should just trust me."

"But…"

I look at him seriously. This somehow must have convinced him. I don't think he understands why I trust Alia with this, but he seems to trust me at least. My heart jumps a little at that thought and I offer him a smile, which he returns. Well, at least he tried… it more looked like he's got some sort of toothache…

"Wheee I'm soooo excited!! A date with ZERO!!! Oh Iris this is gonna be AWESOME!!"

"I'm sure it will!! Shall we go then guys??"

"What, already?!"

Zero looks aghast and hides behind me. Well, as much as he can since he's way taller… I chuckle.

"C'mon Zero, you're a big boy, don't be afraid of a date!"

"I'm NOT afraid!!!" He looks at me somehow pouting, I can't help but continue chuckling.

"Are you coming??" Iris is really annoying. And Zero jumps at these words.

"Well… are we?" I ask him.

"Guess I've got no choice… as you already decided to go…"

"I don't force you to come…"

"You don't think I'm leaving you alone with…" he glares at the girls. "THEM… it's giving me the creeps already, how must you feel? No way, I'm not leaving your side pal!"

With this he takes my arm and starts walking past the girls. I blush at that, trying to hide it from the girls and Zero. I wonder if he even realized he's actually taking my hand… well okay, arm… but that's almost the same! The girls are following us, still giggling. Good god… I'm just glad Zero's with me, I'd never survive that alone!! And I just hope Alia knows what she's doing…


	9. The end XD Don't wanna spoil anything wi...

Final Chapter! Congrats you've lasted till here! And FINALLY I found out that I had a wrong idea of Yaoi all the time sweatdrops I was told that what I'm writing is Shounen-Ai (which I know... of course... ), and Yaoi is with Sex and stuff. Not that I don't like that (XD), but that's not what I'm writing... Well, since nobody of the reviewers mentioned that I guess it doesn't matter right? Who cares! It's Zero and X together, that's all that counts! XDDD (GAHHH I just gotta say this here: I LOVE X8! Just finished it and unlocked the Navigators and stuff! It rocks! Best Rockman game ever! Unfortunately I still dunno where Axl comes from... And the end makes me mad! What's gonna happen? Scared)

Now, before I get to my comments to the reviewers, I'd like to say something. Is it really forbidden to post fanfics here with self-inserts! (which aren'T too bad anyway if you pretend it's made up characters, and I already read fics with own characters here...) Because I had loaded up some other fics which were deleted and my account blocked, that's why I post this so late. Anyway, if you liked this fic I'd be happy if you'd visit my homepage! You'll find ALL of my fanfictions there, which are lots... Okay, they're not all translated yet, gimme some time But at least the Rockman fics are translated XD The page is bein updated right now, so you might have to wait for a week or two. I'd really like to meet some of you there, there's also a forum where we could talk better than here by reviews... sweatdrop And the URL is http:www.ranchan.de

Now again, some words to the reviewers:

FreakyPerson: HAHA! You're reviews always cheer me up and make me laugh so much Glad you like it! I just hope you'll like the end... ('cause I think it sucks XD) I dunno if I should write another one in this style.. it's not what I'm really good at.. (you'll see what I mean if you read my other fics XD) Hm... But I could try to write something with Axl for a change.. XxAxl or ZeroxAxl... What do you think? Hey I really hope we'll meet in my forum It's fun talking with you!

DarkAnimus: Thanks a lot And as you see, I updated! And it's the final! ... sigh How I gonna miss the reviews... it always cheered me up and made me continue.. XD

RemmZ: Thanks for you backup hugs Hey, as long as I've got people here saying they like it, why should I care? I don'T get it anyway why such people are reading this ALTHOUGH I say quite clearly in the introduction it's Yaoi... (What it even isn't as I found out XD)

Me: Well, as I said to RemmZ, why are you here anyway if you don't like Yaoi? Are you so bored or unsatisfied you have to annoy others with destructive comments?

Zeal: ARG! Still didn'T get to read your other fics! I'm so goddamn busy at the moment - But I will! And I'm still waiting for you to update "'Darkness comes to light" Hope you like the end of this fic... somehow I think I'll disappoint you all with it ;

Private: Well, I tried to upload them here ; But as you read, it seems like you have to visit my page to read those. sucks... (Bet this gets deleted for writing this? XD) So English isn't your first language either? So what is it? Where you're from? (not Germany by any chance..? XDD)

Gamegirl: Well, we already talked about that. Glad it's settled btw, you didn't mail for a while, did it get lost again? oO

Now, thanks anyway for reading so far, and since I won't get to reply to the last reviews, I reaaaally hope you'll like it! I might answer to your reviews by mail if you leave it, or we might meet on my page in the forum. hugs everybody Now I won't let you wait anymore, sorry for this long intro, here we go, X POV of course

* * *

Somehow the girls managed to separate Zero and me… Iris said some crap about me being HER date and stuff… I feel that great urge to kill her again… So right now we're heading to some place, Sara with Zero and Iris with me. 

"Hey X, why don't we go to the place where we had our first date?"

I shrug. I so don't care where we're going. I'd even go to the dentist if I could just get rid of her…

"Fine then! Hey Sara, it's that neat little café I told you about!"

"Oohhhh really Iris?"

I take the chance to look at Zero. He's rolling his eyes. Just like I feel… Alia's so gonna pay for this torture!

When we reach the café and go in, Iris – of course – takes that table in the middle of the place as last time. And as well, everybody's staring at us. Yeehaa just what we need. Zero doesn't seem to comfortable with it either. I snicker. Well, why should he feel better than me? At least it's cheering me up a bit I'm not the only one suffering here. But as I am the polite one of us, unlike Zero I don't show this all the time. Okay, last time I showed pretty much because I was really pissed. But this time there's Zero as well, so maybe I can make a good afternoon out of it after all!

Zero's sitting next to me now, the girls on our opposite. Staring at us. Yay. The waitress comes.

"Hello everybody, what can I- oh…"

She must have just realized it was me, the rude guy from before. I grin at her.

"Well… what can I bring you?"

"A beer. There's no other way I can stand this…"

Zero ordered before I could even open my mouth. I chuckle at the bewildered look of Sara. Iris must already be used to Zero's behaviour, she just closed her eyes shaking her head slightly, frowning.

"Sounds good to me! I'll have the same!" I order happily.

Zero grins at me and I grin back.

"The two of us will have milkshakes, thanks." Iris says straight-faced.

Now there's silence. Zero starts to play with the saltcellar. I watch him.

"Well… do you plan on talking to us any time soon? After all, this is a DATE."

Iris seems very pissed already. Her friend Sara doesn't seem to dare to say anything.

"No, I don't. I don't know if X will, but I won't."

Iris glares at Zero, then looks at me.

"So, X? What about you?"

"I… well…"

Iris looks at me as if to say "Agree with him and you will die". Do I care? Jeez, I do…

"Ehm… nice… weather.."

The expressions on the other 3 faces are completely different. First, there's Iris. Her dark face lightened up in split seconds, smiling widely now. Sara's still shifting uncomfortably on her chair. I think she's not sure if I really want to start a conversation or planning on something evil any minute. And lastly, Zero. He looks at me like I just told him I won a million dollars and threw them out of the window…

"Nice WEATHER? What the hell are you talking about!"

I'm pretty sure Zero's surpessing the urge of beating me somehow because he thinks that might bring me back to reality.

"Ah, be quiet Zero! It's not X's fault if you want to be a rude idiot! How I could ever date you it's a secret to me! The way you are, you'll never be able to have a relationship! Nobody could ever stand you longer than 2 weeks!"

"And nobody can stand you longer than 2 minutes! I'm off, nobody wants me here anyway!"

He jumps up. I get up with a start by reflex, grabbing his arm. Iris still looks pissed, Zero just seems angry.

"Let go X! It's better I go before I do something I might regret."

"Please, Zero… don't go! Stay! I…" now I whisper. "don't leave me alone with them!"

He looks at me, thinking about it I assume. Then he sighs and sits down again. Phew I'm glad! What I really wanted to say was 'Don't leave me' But I'm sure that would have rather freaked him out than convinced him to stay…

"Jeez X, I really don't know how you get along with this idiot…"

"Will you please stop arguing with Zero, Iris?"

I wanted this to sound like an order. Instead it sounded like a plea. Whatever, it made her sigh.

"Well, okay X. Just for you I'll pretend he's not there."

"No need for pretending, I can go right away!"

Again he gets up, and again I'm clinging to his arm looking at him. This time he sits back down mumbling.

"Maybe.. I should go…"

Eek! What was that? Oh yeah, Sara, completely forgot about her!

"No no, you stay! It's a double date and Zero AS WELL was willing to go, so he keeps you company!"

"Says who?"

I just wonder that Zero didn't stand up again. There's the answer, our drinks are coming. As the waitress puts them on the table, Zero and me both take our beers and empty them.

"Wow X, still got it in ya I guess? I'm impressed!"

"Sure. Only because I don't drink as often as you do doesn't mean I can take less!"

"Ah, isn't that cute? Little X growing up!"

"Hey stop that!"

I laugh, and Zero's smiling all along.

"Seems you two have lots of fun…"

ARGH Iris again! Why must she ruin my special moments?

"You should be talking to ME, X!"

"Oh well.. ehm… I'm better in… ehm… listening…"

Gotta get myself out somehow! What should I talk to Iris about anyway? There's nothing I want her to know… So I just listen now, trying not to fall asleep… Hey, Zero's smile vanished again! He looks at Iris as if he's going to kill her any second. Yeah I know, I feel the urge too…

After a while Iris is still talking to me. I don't really listen to her. Zero's just pissed and didn't say anthing for over 30 minutes. I just stick to my 'nod-and-smile' tactic. Seems to work so far. But I think now it's time for me to act.

"Sorry Iris, but… ehm…"

Whoops! She seems offended by my interruption. Must have been an important part she was talking about. Hm, who cares…

"Well, I think we should go, it's already late and…"

"Late? It's 6pm!"

"Yeah, as I said, it's late… for… ehm…. The restaurant!"

"Which restaurant? X, don't tell me that… AWWW that's SOOO cute you wanted to surprise me by inviting me to a nice restaurant!"

What have I done! And why did I mention a restaurant! Couldn't have said anything more stupid! Iris is smiling all over her face, but not enough, she's jumping up coming over to me… now I'm really scared and back off as far as my chair will let me…

Zero still looks pissed, but now he seems to realize that Iris got up running towards me. Well, the running's over already, now she's practically sitting on my lap hugging me like there's no tomorrow. Oh my god, I think she's trying to kiss me! I freeze. I don't want this to happen! Zero's right next to me watching us, I don't want him to see me like that!

Just when I gathered all my bravery to push her away from me, Zero already got up and shoved her off me violently. The sound she makes when she hits the floor isn't very nice. She looks up at us in disbelief, Zero giving her a killing glance, fuming. I don't see him like this often… It's giving me the creeps as well…

"Do you think you can always do it this way? Just kiss a guy and thinking you're making him yours that way? Ever thought of the possibility that he DOESN'T want to be kissed by you?"

"Oh you must talk Zero! You seemed to enjoy our kiss very much back then!"

I listen up. It's about that stupid kiss!

"Enjoy? ENJOY?" he really looks like he's going to beat her up. "Enjoy isn't really what I'd call it! Just like you're trying with X now you just kissed me when I wasn't prepared! I just regret I couldn't pull back faster and didn't beat you up for that!"

"You wish! But it's not you I want now, it's X. And I'm sure he doesn't mind me kissing him, right X?"

She comes dangerously near to my face, but before I can say anything, Zero's talking again. This time very calm, but awesome.

"Listen Iris. I only tell you this once. Stay away from X, don't come near to him ever again! I swear to god, I'll rip you apart! He's MINE!"

Now there's silence. What did he just say? I can't put my senses together, I'm still scared of him somehow. And now he looks at me. No smile. I'm really scared…

"You're coming with me now."

With this he just takes me by my arm and drags me out of the café. I don't even dare to say anything. Who knows what he's up to?

…

We're already walking for 10 minutes now. I still don't know where he's about to go. But I still don't dare to ask. So far, that is. I feel like sometime soon I've got a right to know where he's leading me to. I just give it a try.

"Zero… where are you taking me?"

He stops so I nearly run into him.

"Is that all you wanna know?"

What is he talking about?

"Sure I wanna know! I don't know what's up with you! You just freaked out throwing Iris on the floor and dragging me away, and now we're walking to the middle of nowhere for more than 10 minutes already!"

"Well, sure, that's all that matters to you right? How I treated Iris! I thought she annoyed you as well, but you seem to care for her a lot right?"

"What the heck are you talking about Zero! I don't know who I care less for! You know me… I can't really HATE someone… but if I would, it would be her!"

"Ha, who are you kidding? If you dislike her so much, why you played Mr. Romantic? Talking about the weather, listening to her stories and such crap?"

"Mr. Romantic! Oh yeah sure! Weather is soooo romantic right? If you didn't realize, I just wanted to be polite! I'm not like you! I can't tell someone directly that he's going on my nerves because that would hurt him! I'm sorry I'm like that and that you don't like my attitude, but it's me and I can't change it! Take it or leave it! If you can't live with the way I am, I'm afraid you have to pass on me!"

I didn't want this to get this far… I never got worked up over something like this before. And Zero seems to notice.

"X… I'm sorry…"

What is he sorry for! Hey wait.. I think I've got tears in my eyes! I didn't even realize it in my rage… Damn.. perfect timing… Ah damnit, it's all Zero's fault!

"That's all you do right? Apologizing everytime you mess something up! How about thinking BEFORE acting for a change? Might have its advantages!" Now I'm really crying. "And just to let you know, I DO dislike Iris for a reason! I-"

I can't say anymore because at this point Zero pulls me towards him and kisses me very passionately. I wonder if this is a dream…

He doesn't stop for quite a long time. I'm not tense anymore, I let myself fall, just let Zero hold me tight and kiss me. I never want this to end… Unfortunately, it does…

I look up to him, still with teary eyes.

"Guess what."

"You're sorry?"

I lower my gaze. Yeah that would fit. Just as I said, he's always acting without thinking and afterwards sorry… Well, this time I'm glad he just acted…

"I'm absolutely NOT sorry!"

Did he really just say that? I look up at him again, disbelievingly. Hi wipes away some tears from my cheek with his thumb, then pulls me back in his embrace.

"Didn't you wonder why I said 'you're mine' in the café?"

"But why… I mean… all the time I thought… hell I'm confused…"

Zero smiles.

"Not more than I am… I was sure you'd beat me up if I'd try to kiss ya."

"I would never. I mean, this is what I was wishing for all the time."

I stop when I realize what I am saying and I blush.

"Hey X, no need to blush anymore!" He chuckles. "I think we both got some facts wrong the last days… I really thought you liked Iris… It was hell for me arranging that date!"

"I didn't ask you for it! You idiot just did it without asking me, and trust me you would have done both of us a favor if you WOULDN'T have done that…"

Now I finally smile again. It's weird. We're talking like nothing happened! Come to think of what happened…

"Zero… so.. there really wasn't a kiss between the two of you?"

"Jeez X please stop with that now. I hate to even think of that! It wasn't a kiss I told ya. SHE tried but I refused. I told you already, I think a kiss shows more emotions than anything else…"

"You just kissed me…"

He grins and squeezes me a bit.

"X, just want to let you know, about what you said earlier… I do like you exactly the way you are. Don't you ever change! You're the X I fell in love with! Oh well okay, some improvement in swearing and drinking wouldn't be that bad." He snickers.

"Well, I want you to stay the way you are as well. Thinking before acting MIGHT have advantages as I said. But the other way round you handle it it has, as well.."

We smile at each other. I can't remember if I was ever this happy before in my life…

"Just let me ask one more question about Iris!"

Zero sighs and stops squeezing me, looking very annoyed.

"If you insist… but after this I really want to end that topic. I don't wanna talk about Iris okay? It is YOU I love!"

I blush again and almost forget what I was about to say.

"Aw X you're so cute when you're blushing!"

He rubs his chin against mine like I was a plushie. He's actually holding me like a plushie as well… Whee I feel so comfortable!

"Well, why did you date her all the time if you hate her like that? Did you like her that time or what?"

"Nope. Never liked her a bit. But the day she started working at HQ, you could see she liked me… somehow… And you realized as well I think, because you always acted a bit jealous when she was around me, not much, but enough that I realized. Well, I never thought you could really LOVE me, I thought it was just because she might take your friend away. And I used the chance to try to make you jealous."

"Which worked perfectly well. I almost died you meanie!" I poke him a bit. "But hey, does that mean you already liked me.. ehm.. more at that time already?"

"I do as long as I know you X… But stubborn as I am, I didn't want to admit it to myself at first, then I didn't want to lose my cool reputation. Stupid I know. But imagine! The cool, strong Zero – GAY!"

"Well, you are. Right?"

"…"

I laugh wholeheartedly and hug him closely.

"So, now that things are settled, don't you think Iris could finally leave HQ? Her job is done, we're together."

"Zero! You're really mean! Although I have to admit this sounds tempting… Hey know what? I wonder how you could have realized back then I was just slightly jealous when I even didn't know myself how much I felt for you, but the last days when I gave you so many hints you didn't have the slightest clue!"

"Well… I think it's because I just didn't thought you could love me…"

"Aw… well you confused me a lot as well… always said weird things and I couldn't tell if you liked her or not."

"Did I say only ONCE I liked her? I think I pointed out clearly that I greatly dislike her."

"But-"

He's right. When I think of it NOW he NEVER let a doubt at how much he disliked her. Love is really turning one into an idiot I guess…

"Let's stop talking now."

Zero looks deep into my eyes. I never want to let him go…

"I love you Zero! With all my heart!"

"I love you even more!

"Impossible!"

"Stop talking already silly!"

And with this we share our second kiss, but not the last, that's for sure. Well, I never would have thought, but Alia's plan worked… Guess the plan was all about getting Zero so jealous he would just let his feelings out, and it worked… I gotta thank her for her help sometime… But now, I enjoy this kiss and being held by Zero as I always wished to be.

* * *

GAHHHHHHHHHHHH done! But I don't know… I'm not quite satisfied with the ending… I think I could have done better… (btw, thanks to Dy-Chan for "nod and smile", she knows what I mean XD) 

Well, hope you like it anyways. So what do you think? Should I write a little more like some kind of sequal? Or maybe just like "What happened after they got back to HQ"? (THAT would be fun XD) I'd also give it a thought to write something with Axl... He's so cute Let me know, I'll take a break now!


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